Human nature is such that, when a person does a favor for someone, he naturally expects gratitude in return. If time passes and the anticipated expression of thanks does not come, the benefactor will often find a “casual” way to remind the recipient – perhaps by asking how he enjoyed or benefited from what was done for him.
The Chida explains that this insight sheds light on the story of Manoach, the father of Shimshon. After the mysterious visitor foretold Shimshon’s birth, Manoach realized that this was no ordinary man, but a malach Hashem – an angel of G-d. How did he know? Because the man neither returned to see the outcome of his words, nor did he seek any expression of gratitude. A human being would have desired acknowledgement or appreciation. Only an angel, who acts solely as a messenger of Hashem without any trace of self-interest, would deliver the message and depart without looking back.
True chesed is measured, not only by what we give, but by what we expect in return. When kindness is performed with an eye toward recognition, it ceases to be pure. The malach teaches us that the highest form of giving is when one acts purely for the sake of Heaven – to bring joy, comfort or goodness to another – and then quietly steps aside. Such selfless giving reflects the Divine model of chesed, the kindness of Hashem, Who sustains His world every moment, asking for nothing in return.
