וַתִּצְפְנֵהוּ שְלֹשָׁה יְרָׁחִּים (“and they hid him for three months” Shmos 2,2)
The Holy Zohar cites this Pasuk as an allusion to the three months that are difficult for a healthy blessing, which are Tamuz, Av, and Teves. Zohar Chadash states there are four months, which are Tamuz, Av, Teves and Shvat. (some explain it to mean the first half of Av and the first half of Shvat plus Av and Tamuz; thus, this source also maintains three total months).
Poskim discuss if it is proper to refrain from getting married in these months referenced in the Zohar. The following is arranged by order of the months as to what days one should refrain from making a wedding.
NISSAN
From Rosh Chodesh until the night of the 14th of the month it is permitted to make a wedding. On the day of the 14th (Erev Pesach) we are accustomed not to make a wedding since the meal for the wedding might go into the night. On the festival of Pesach, it is prohibited to make a marriage (like on Shabbos) since a wedding is a form of acquisition which are not performed on Shabbos or Yom Tovim. During Chol haMoed is also forbidden since we do not mix one Simchah with another. After Pesach until the end of the month the custom is not to hold weddings due to the “mourning” of Sefirah.
IYAR
In this month the custom is not to hold weddings due to the “mourning” of Sefirah. From the primary law this applies only until through the 17th of the month (Lag b’Omer is the 18th of the month), nevertheless the custom has spread that we do not arrange weddings until Shavuos. The Ta”z says this is related to the decree of 4856 (the Crusades) which occurred in this time period. Others say that based on the Ariz”l that we do not take haircuts until just prior to Shavuos, we also do not make weddings until then. On the 18th of the month, the yahrzeit of Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai, we do arrange weddings.
SIVAN
According to what is stated above, one should refrain from marriages until Shavuos. However, since the Mogen Avrohom rules that we are lenient regarding the cutting of hair on the three days prior to Shavuos, the custom is to make weddings during these three days if necessary. On Shavuos one is not allowed to make a wedding. The rest of the month is permitted to make weddings. On the 20th of the month. it was a custom in Poland not make a wedding due to the happenings of 5408-09 (Tach v’Tat). However, the Satmar Rebbe states this custom only applies to residents of Poland or those that left.
TAMUZ
From the 17th of the month until the end of the month, one does not make weddings due to the mourning regarding the destruction of the Bais haMikdash. It is stated in the name of the Ruziner Rebbe that one should refrain from the beginning of the month of Tamuz. The Minchas Elezar brings an opinion that one does not make weddings during Tamuz since the Zohar mentions Tamuz as one of the months. However, the Minchas Elezar states that most Poskim do not caution about these first 16 days. Divrei Yoel agrees. And it is recorded that the Tzanzer Rebbe made a wedding for his son in the beginning of Tamuz.
Ninth of Tamuz is recorded as the day the breach was made in the wall of the first Bais haMikdash. We fast on the 17th of Tamuz since that was the day of the breach in the wall of the Second Bais haMikdash. However, the Mogen Avrohom writes that a Baal haNefesh should also fast on the 9th of Tamuz. Thus, in Belz they do not make weddings on this day. However, most communities are not concerned for this issue and do not refrain from making weddings.
AV
Rosh Chodesh until the tenth of the month it is prohibited to make weddings due to the mourning regarding the destruction of the Bais haMikdash. Some wait till after Shabbos Nachamu. Others wait until the fifteenth of the month according to the statement of Chaza”l that there were no Yovim Tovim like the 15th of Av.
ELUL
It is permissible to make a wedding the entire month. Even though in the rest of the months we attempt to avoid making a wedding in the latter part of the month (when the moon is “lacking”), we are not concerned in this month. Elul is a time of mercy and ratzon and thus, we are lenient on this matter.
TISHREI
According to the law, we do not make weddings on the holidays of Rosh HaShana, Yom Kippur, or Sukkos. We also do not make weddings during Chol haMoed in order not to mix together simchas. The custom is not make weddings during the Ten days of Repentance. However, in the four days between Yom Kippur and Sukkos it is permissible to make a wedding. After Sukkos till the end of the month, it is permissible to make a wedding.
CHESVAN
There are some who refrain from making weddings in this month since it is called MarChesvan (bitter). Poskim clearly state there is no concern and weddings are permitted in this month.
KISLEV
According to all weddings are permitted the entire month, including Chanukah.
TEVES
An opinion states that one does not make weddings during Teves since the Zohar mentions Teves as one of the months. However, as stated above most Poskim are not concerned and allow weddings throughout the month. However, on the day of the ninth (prior to the fast) we have a custom not to make a wedding. Others also mention we do not make a wedding on the night of the 11th (night following the fast). Another custom is not to make a wedding on the night of Nittel Nacht if it falls in this month.
SHVAT
In the first half of the month the custom is to refrain from making weddings as mentioned in the Zohar. However, most Poskim allow weddings throughout the month.
ADAR
This month of Simchah poses no problem for weddings. The days of the Purim (14th and 15th of the month) is a question among the Poskim since we encounter the problem of mixing Simchah with another Simchah.
Finally, the Poskim are divided about the making weddings on the first, third, and fifth days of the week.
