Meriting to See a Joyful Conclusion Through Emunah and Patience
The Rav Who Was Dismissed
We have discussed at length that the more a Yid trusts in Hashem and relies on Him, even when everything seems dark and ominous, the more he will merit to see a joyful conclusion to the sorrowful situation, because this is the reward of the ba’al bitachon, just as we find regarding Avraham Avinu, who merited the assurance of בשיבה תקבר טובה, because בה והאמין’, he trusted in Hashem....
An incredible story told by the Chofetz Chaim underscores this concept:
“When I was young,” related the Chofetz Chaim, “there was a certain prominent rav who was dismissed from his position as a town’s rav because, sadly, his children were pulled to Haskallah. It always bothered me... he was such a special person, such a chashuve Yid... how could he have deserved such humiliation?”
Beautiful Generations Because of the Tzarah
Continued the Chofetz Chaim, “50 years later (!) the picture became clear to me. Because he was fired from his position, this rav moved to a small chassidishe shtetl where he was accepted as the rav. It was not as prominent as his original position, but it was something....
Because he moved there, his children befriended the chassidishe bachurim in the town, and thanks to these friendships, they transformed themselves completely, growing into G-d-fearing talmidei chachomim. Furthermore, they went on to establish upstanding Torah homes—and to serve as rabbanim of cities in their own right.
It took half a century for the Chofetz Chaim to see how a seemingly terrible calamity was transformed into the greatest kindness for this rav for eternity!
We Cannot Foresee the Positive Outcome
Versions of this story play themselves out for us all on a constant basis—but there is avodah that we must do: To internalize the idea in our hearts and minds that there is a long game at play.
When we experience pain and we believe that it is all for the good, take note; we will see that good will come forth from even the seemingly worst events!
It is a painful topic but let us take the issue of shidduchim.... Sometimes a child wants to marry a person who is considered a “weaker shidduch,” and the parents—justifiably—do everything in their power to stop it, but to no avail. The shidduch goes through.
How many times do we see—five or ten years down the line—that davka through this shidduch emerged the best possible scenario; they strengthened each other in Yiddishkeit and made a complete turnaround together.
This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t do what we feel is best for our children. But if, after our hishtadlus, things didn’t go as we wished, we should remember that there is a bigger plan, and in later years it is possible that we will see things turn out to have been for the best.
Living Olam HaBa in This World
As we have noted in the past in the name of the sefarim hakedoshim, קבולי דיסורי סמא, the remedy for yissurim is accepting those yissurim. And we are assured that בחייך תראה עולמך, we will merit to see our Olam HaBa in This World.
Usually, the Next World is reserved for the afterlife. But if a Yid places himself into spirit of Olam HaBa in This World, he proclaims, “I don’t know the Heavenly calculations. I am singing and dancing because I trust the Ribbono shel Olam!” Then, this Yid can be shown Olam HaBa in This World. He has earned it by living on that level, despite the excruciating difficulty inherent therein.
Such a Yid will merit to see the joyful end; either the end will be hastened, or he will be given longer years in order to witness how the saga ends in joyfulness—this is the assurance of בחייך תראה עולמך, seeing the Next World in This World.
The Contrast Between the Nachas of Binyamin and Dan
Underscoring further the need to trust Hashem and looking at the long game, the Chofetz Chaim points us to the contrast between the shevatim of Binyamin and Dan. Binyamin had ten children, while Dan had one single child—Chushim—who was a deaf-mute. This was Dan’s entire nachas....
Let us imagine the pain: The two brothers come to a simchah, each bringing his family. One brother is surrounded by ten successful, ehrliche children, while the other has a single special-needs child seated near him.... Can we imagine the pain?
This scenario, sadly, occurs very often—and the pain is excruciating. How much agmas nefesh do people incur due to these situations? How many people leave simchos early because the pain is too much to bear? It is truly a great source of heartache—suffering that is not to be trivialized.
But, says the Chofetz Chaim, let us see what happened years later.
The Largest Shevet
When we peruse the pesukim in Parashas Bamidbar, we see that when the Yidden were counted, Shevet Dan’s numbers came to 62,700 people, while Binyamin’s numbers totaled 35,400! What an end to the saga of that one child, Chushim ben Dan!
No one should ever experience the pain that parents of such children endure; it is so difficult.... But so often, when looking at the end of the story, we see a good ending even in This World.
We must simply believe in this concept, and we will be granted the zechus of witnessing it with our eyes.
Accepting Hashem’s Plan Brings So Much Blessing
When Everything Fell Apart in Eliezer’s Face
The Arugas HaBosem teaches a tremendous yesod that we see regarding Eliezer the servant of Avraham Avinu. As we know, he was the most loyal and dedicated servant, and he presumed that Avraham would give him his son Yitzchak as a husband for his daughter.
He so hoped for this, but one day, Avraham sent him on a mission to find a kallah for his son. “But what about me?” he asked. “You?! You’re cursed [he was a descendant of the children of Cham, who was cursed by Noach], and I am blessed; thus, we are not compatible.”
This should have been such a betrayal and a disappointment to Eliezer: He lost his entire future in one instant... he could have been hesitant about the mission before him.... But no, he carried it out with unmatched devotion and loyalty—as we read in the pesukim that describe the saga.
The Earth’s Bittul in Accepting Hashem’s Decree
Where did Eliezer learn such exceptional bittul?
“From the earth,” says the Arugas Habosem. “Chazal tell us that when HaKadosh Baruch Hu created the world, He asked each of the creations how they want to be created and what form they would take.
“When it came to the earth, she asked, ‘And what is being suggested for me? What will I be?’ ‘Earth,’ said Hashem, ‘You will be trampled and trod upon... this will be your mission.’ (Rosh Hashanah 11:1). Explain Chazal: Why is she called לעשות שרצתה ארץ? קונה רצון, she wanted to fulfill the will of her Creator. ‘The Ribbono shel Olam wants me to be in this position? This is what I want, too!’ The earth fulfilled her mission completely, knowing that this is her mission, and that this is how she must serve her Creator (Bereishis Rabbah 5:8).
“For this reason, explains the Arugas HaBosem, “Avraham Avinu made Eliezer swear in the name of Hashem the Master of the Heaven and the Master of the earth, exhorting him to learn the lesson from the earth and accept his mission with faith and trust.”
Similarly, a person must always be prepared to say, “That person’s mission is to sit in the Beis Medrash all day and learn Torah, but I have a different mission—and I will carry out my mission faithfully.”
Becoming Blessed Through Acceptance
Concludes the Arugas HaBosem, “What was the end of this saga? Eliezer went on to be transformed from being cursed to being blessed, as Chazal tell us (Bereishis Rabbah 60:7) on the pasuk בא השם ברוך, come in, one blessed by Hashem.”
How is one transformed into a ברוך? By accepting whatever comes at us, as excruciating as it may be... even when the entire future seems lost, and by agreeing with Hashem’s plan, saying,
“If this is what Hashem wants, and this is my mission, I accept it wholeheartedly.”
With this, he explains the pasuk עמדי לשבת ארץ בנאמני עיני, My eyes are upon the faithful of the land, that they may dwell with Me (Tehillim 101:6). HaKadosh Baruch Hu wants to sit with the faithful of the land; those who are mevatel themselves like the earth and accept His Will wholeheartedly, thus emulating the earth.
This is much easier said than done—but Eliezer did this, and his reward was to be called blessed by the Torah HaKedoshah — but that was not all: In Kisvei Arizal we are taught that the neshamah of Eliezer was reincarnated in the body of Kalev ben Yefuneh, who received the portion of Chevron in Eretz HaKodesh!
When a Yid agrees to the plan and the mission of Hashem for him, everything is transformed to good.
There’s an Ultimate Purpose for Every Neshamah
The sefer נשמות גלגולי by the Rama MiPano shows us precisely how every neshamah reaches its destination, fulfilling its mission. It’s frightening to contemplate the way every neshamah has its journey to sheleimus. Indeed, the Rambam teaches that the fact that every neshamah has its own unique mission and journey is the precise reason for Chazal’s dictate, הטובה על שמברך כשם הרעה על לברך אדם חייב, one is obligated to give thanks for the bad just as he is obligated to give thanks for the good (Mishnah Berachos 9:5). Because if we look at the end of the journey, it is always good, and there is always reason to give thanks! This takes no small amount of emotional strength, but, with much emunah and bitachon, this madreigah, too, can be achieved.
Emunah Gives Us Emotional Fortitude
When we think about it, how can we even imagine that we see the entire picture? Often, we are like children who throw a tantrum when they want something. They cry and they scream as their parent attempts to reason with them. “Why are you crying? You’re getting something so much better.” But the child doesn’t want to hear... and all reason falls on deaf ears.
Sometimes, we are like that child—because we don’t have the ability to see the long game. We don’t have the ability to see cheshbonos Shamayim. The only way is to fortify ourselves with emunah and bitachon... knowing that even if we don’t understand, the truth remains that everything is for our good. And if we live with this understanding, we will later merit to see the good with our own eyes!
