And the officers shall speak to the people, saying, What man is there who has built a new house and has not [yet] inaugurated it? Let him go and return to his house, lest he die in the war, and another man inaugurate it.
Rashi explains that if a person were to build himself a house but would be unable to live in it, while another person would end up taking over his home and living in it, he is exempt from going out to war because, “this would be a matter of great aggravation to him.” The person would experience tremendous pain and grief specifically regarding someone else living in the house.
If he would die in war, that would not be enough of a tragedy to justify a deferment. But the thought that someone else would live in his house is unbearable! It would drive him crazy. It would affect his morale to such an extent that he could not be an effective soldier. The Torah recognized this reality and excused such a soldier from the army, lest his negative morale effect the whole military unit.
R’ Leib Chasman zt”l explains that the Torah understands the nature of human beings. A human being may not be so upset at the specter of never having lived in a house that he built. But the prospect of building a house, never living in it, and someone else living in that house, is too much to bear.
But the Torah is also giving us mussar. For if we were more spiritual and had loftier character traits, we would have a different perspective. We would feel differently about someone else living in our house. We would think, “If I cannot live in this house at least somebody else will be able to live there.” The “aggravation” that Rashi is referring to is caused by our own poor character traits. Our lack of generosity of spirit causes our aggravation. The biggest incentive a person has to be a less selfish person is that he will become a happier person, because he will not be constantly “aggravated” by his own selfishness and jealousies.
