Haircut
17. The minhag is not to get a haircut during sefira (שו''ע סי' תצ''ג ס''ב ), on the days one practices some halachos of aveilus, depending on the opinions and minhagim mentioned above.
18. Men. The issur to get a haircut applies to any spot with a concentration of hair. Thus, the minhag is not to cut the hair of the head or beard (שו''ע סי' תקנ''א סי''ג ). If one’s mustache hairs are interfering with eating, he may trim them (שו''ע ומ''ב שם ). The poskim discuss whether one may shave his beard for a meeting with an important official (שו''ת זרע אמת סי' ס''ט ). However, nowadays, that it is common and accepted for a person to be unshaven even among the nations of the world and officials, this heter falls away, and each person should follow the Shulchan Aruch.
19. Women. The minhag not to get a haircut also applies to women, to the hair of their heads or any other spot with a concentration of hair. However, plucking isolated hairs is not called a haircut. Thus, a woman may do her eyebrows and pluck isolated body hairs if they bother her (מו''ר בשו''ת שבט הקהתי ח''ה סי' צ''ח אות ג'). Similarly, a woman may remove leg hair where necessary (אוצר הלכות סי' תצ''ג אות ז') as well as continue laser treatment for hair removal.
20. Necessity. If a haircut is necessary, e.g., for health purposes, to trim some hair to even it out, for a girl whose hair is in her eyes and bothering her, or for lice, nits, or sores on the scalp (הליכות אבן ישראל ), one may cut the hair. Similarly, if one needs a haircut for a halacha or a mitzva, e.g., a woman needs to cut hair coming out from under her head covering or the hair at her temples for tznius purposes (פמ''ג, הגר''ש וואזנר קובץ מבית לוי בין המצרים ), or her hair is too long and pushing the boundaries of tznius, she may get a haircut.
21. Children. The minhag is not to give haircuts even to children below chinuch age; the reason is for the anguish of the adults (ע''פ שעה''צ סי' תקנ''א סקצ''א ). However, if the hair bothers the child and not his parents, one may cut his hair.
22. Chalaka/upsherin. Strictly speaking, it should be mutar to make an upsherin for a three-year-old boy, as doing so is merely making peyos, not giving a haircut (שו''ת תורת יקותיאל מהדו''ק סי' מ''ז ). However, the minhag is to wait until Lag b’Omer. Then, one may cut his hair on the night of Lag b’Omer; he does not need to wait until the morning, like for gedolim or for the 34th of the omer according to the Mechaber (see Issue 265). Even for those who follow the Arizal’s minhag not to get a haircut on any of the days of sefira, the minhag is to do an upsherin on the day of Lag b’Omer (אריז''ל ).
23. Bris, chosson. One may get a haircut for a real mitvza need, even the night before doing the mitzva (מ''ב סקי''ג ), e.g., baalei bris (רמ''א סי' תצ''ג ס''ב )—the mohel, sandek, and father, but not the grandparents or “kvatter” (מ''ב שם סקי''ב )—or a chosson for his wedding or aufruf Shabbos (שערי תשובה שם ). However, one may not get a haircut for a pidyon haben, as we do not find a heter given for this purpose.
24. Bar mitzva boy. Some poskim allow a bar mitzva boy to get a haircut for his bar mitzva (מקור חיים לחוות יאיר ס''ב ). Others do not allow it, just as a bar mitzva is not a reason to omit Tachanun (שו''ת משנה הלכות ח''ו סי' מ''ה ). Where necessary, one may rely on the meikel poskim to allow a boy to get a haircut for his bar mitzva while he is a katan (הגרשז''א הליכות שלמה פסח פי''א סט''ז ).
25. Barber. One whose minhag on a given day is that he does not get haircuts may still give a haircut to a person whose minhag is to be meikel on that day. The issur during aveilus is to get a haircut, not to give one (הגרשז"א, הליכות שלמה ניסן פי"א דבר הלכה אות ל"ה ).
26. Nails. One may cut his nails during sefira without any restrictions [we received shailos about this...]
Weddings
27. Weddings. The minhag is not to marry during the days of sefira when one practices aveilus (שו''ע שם ס''א ). A second marriage is also assur (כף החיים סק''ג ), unless one is remarrying his former wife who he divorced, which does not involve so much simcha (מ''ב סק''א ).
28. “L’chaim,” “tenaim.” One may make a “l’chaim” or a seuda for “tenaim” upon completing a shidduch during sefira; the reason is so that no one else should marry her first (מ''ב סק''ג ). The attendees may sing songs for the chosson while everyone is sitting together, but they may not dance for the simcha (מ''ב שם ). Musical instruments certainly should not be played (שו''ת מנח"י ח''א קי''א ).
