What do you call an angry golfer? Teed off!
Which ancient Egyptian pharaoh liked to golf? King Putt.
Did you hear about the golfer whose clubs burst into flames? He had several irons in the fire.
I shot one under at golf today. One under a tree, one under a bush, and one under the water.
Why do golf announcers whisper? Because they don’t want to wake up the people watching.
In Jerusalem, a journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day, everyday, for a long, long time. She went to the Wailing Wall and there he was! She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, she approached him for an interview. “Sir, how long have you been coming to the Wall and praying?” “For about 50 years.” Said the old man. “50 years! That’s amazing! What do you pray for?” “Well, I pray for peace. I pray for all the hatred to stop and I pray for all our children to grow up wise, in safety and friendship.” “How do you feel after doing this for 50 years?” “Like I’m talking to a wall!”
All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand.
