STORY
I was sitting in the car of one of my Chasidim who was taking me to a Chasuna, and he overheard me saying to myself: “I couldn’t care less!” He asked me what that was all about, and I told him that I just found out that all my hard work in producing my Bitachon Weekly went to the garbage, since 7 hard-earned pages that I wrote were lost, with all my brilliant Chidushei Torah that the Olam desperately needs; and it’s lost forever.
And how does a person who always learns Shaar HaBitachon overtime react? “I couldn’t care less! And I’m actually happy. I lost it!” My Rebbe, R' Chaim Mordechai Wainkrantz Zatzal told me, that in the next world we’ll be punished for having aggravation, Chas V'shalom, since: כָּל מַאי דְעָבֵיד רַחְמָנָא לְטַב עָבֵיד Whatever Hashem does, is surely best, and having Agmas Nefesh (anguish) is the opposite of having true Bitachon! And I say “I couldn’t care less” with a tremendous Simcha, and a coldness and laughter.
In fact, if I hadn’t lost those pages, it would have been the worst thing for me! (see Gemara). Hashem cares for me and my holy work much more than I care for myself, and if He wants me to make mistakes and lose things, “He knows what He’s doing! I’m in good hands!”
This is what Chag HaPesach does for me. I love those delicious Matzos and their Segula of: מֵיכְלָא דִמְהֵימְנוּתָא וּמֵיכְלָא דְאַסְוָותָא i.e., food that gives you a Refua (and I’m sure this includes plenty of Refuas HaNefesh) and it gives you Emuna and Bitachon. (Zohar).
I love the Sedarim of the most beautiful Yom Tov, and all those Chidushei Torah I try to be M’chadesh, and enjoy the delicious food and relaxed atmosphere together with all those holy Jews, and a bonus of having so many super sweet and holy Bnei Torah in our midst. אַשְרֵי חֶלְקָם Fortunate is their lot!
But by far, the main message and accomplishment of Y’mei HaPesach is to learn from the most incredible experience of Yetzias Mitzrayim. To learn to have all kinds of Bitachon in our real lives. That’s why I learn extra Mussar about Bitachon during Y’mei HaPesach and all the way till Shavuos. Sometimes, we Davka have Nisyonos on Y’mei HaPesach to inspire more active Mussar.
Like this year, a few days before Yom Tov I discovered that I had a: רוֹיז cellulitis, Rachmana Litzlan, and I was going to Montreal to my relatives for Yom Tov. So I spent lots of time working on Bitachon until the next time I saw the doctor. He said that my condition improved so quickly, that maybe it wasn’t even a: רוֹיז cellulitis (this is exactly what I davened for!) My mind was loaded with positive thoughts of big Yeshuos, and it came true.
I’ve observed these: הַנְהָגוֹת activities by my Rabbeim, especially R' Gershon Liebman Zatzal, whose Simcha level during the Nazi Holocaust was even greater than in normal times. He was always super-jovial, and he was in a constant laughing mode. In times of difficulty, Novardokers learn extra Mussar, and their Simcha level rises.
While I worked on my Bitachon overtime, I had in mind that the Bitachon for myself should help for others as well. I called a friend who has crazy difficult wild kids, and for years and years is without any Eitza, and I guaranteed him a total turn around. This was just before Shabbos HaGadol, and later he told me that beginning Shabbos HaGadol, he suddenly had before him the most well behaved, Geshmaka kids, who stayed up Pesach night, and participated beautifully in Sippur Yetzias Mitzrayim.
There were also major Shalom Bayis Yeshuos, and nervous people calming down, with Hashem’s help.
Montreal for Pesach
When I came to Montreal for Pesach, suddenly there was a major blackout, and the frum Olam had to spend the Seder nights without electricity. They had to use candles, and endured all kinds of hardships. People asked me what is my take on this Hashgacha. I’m not a Navi, but Chazal say: טוֹב פַעַם אַחַת בְצַעַר מִמֵאָה שֶלֹּא בְצַעַר It’s worth way more when it’s harder. It could be that Hashem wanted to give us a Zechus, so He gave us 200 Sedarim!
I need to Chazzer (repeat) this hundreds of times, that this was my greatest Pesach. P.S. Be relaxed and satisfied with how Hashem made your world.
Those who had a normal Pesach, don’t feel so bad. You should look at yourselves as Tzaddikim for a different reason. You were Zoche to a normal Pesach, and that means you are a Tzaddik. Hashem wants each person to feel special.
