The wonderful days of Purim have arrived!
Purim is an especially holy time. There is a well-known allusion to this: כפורים יום can be read as, "a day like Purim." This implies that the holiest day of the year, Yom Kippur, is really second in kedushah to Purim. It's a mistake to think that on Purim it's okay to loosen up a little and be less strict about Torah and mitzvah observance, tzniyus, proper Jewish behavior in general.
It's really the opposite. Purim is a very holy time, it's a unique once-a-year opportunity to grow in Torah and kedushah and ruchniyus.
The Jewish people never came as close to annihilation as they did in the time of Haman and Achashverosh, when the decree of להשמיד להרוג ולאבד את כל היהודים was announced simultaneously in every country in the world where Jews lived. What was the colossal sin that brought this on? Chazal say it's because they enjoyed themselves at the banquet held by Achashverosh. He made a big party, and the Jews came and had a great time, and that's why Heaven decreed to wipe them out.
Apparently, the type of party you participate in makes a big difference.
We are all going to be celebrating the Purim miracle by hosting or attending a seudas Purim, by sending shalach manos, by the other mitzvos of the day. We should make sure our seudah is a seudas Mordechai v'Esther, and not like a seudas Achashverosh.
How can you tell the difference?
If the atmosphere is one of simchas mitzvah, if men and women are not intermingled, if it is not wild and silly, if people are not making fun of others and speaking lashon hara, but rather there are divrei Torah v'Mussar, and songs praising Hakadosh Baruch Hu, then that's a seudas tzaddikim.
However, if men and woman are not separate, and people are making fun of others and just behaving senselessly, what did we gain? We didn't make a zecher to the seudah of Mordechai and Esther and the Jewish people, but rather a zecher to the seudah of Achashverosh...
On Purim you need to check the mishloach manos you receive to make sure everything is up to proper kashrus standards, because mishloach manos often come in from various and sundry sources. You should also make sure to tell the children, who go from home to home, that they should only eat things that they are sure it's properly kosher.
During the seudah, all the regular halachos applying to a seudah should be properly observed. Make sure all berachos are properly recited, and that the celebrating does not cause a failure to daven properly. Purim is a very holy day and we should be more careful about these things than at ordinary times of the year.
If we observe Purim with kedushah and tzniyus, with simchah shel mitzvah and divrei Torah, with songs of praise to Hakadosh Baruch Hu, it will have the same effect today that Purim did back then: it will cancel all evil decrees on us and on the entire Jewish people, אמן כן יהיה רצון.
