How could a pregnancy that came through such heartfelt tefillos produce a child drawn to avodah zarah? This was the question troubling Rivkah Imeinu.
The Torah tells us, “Vayisrotz’tzu habanim b’kirbah” — the children struggled within her (Bereishis 25:22). Rashi explains that when Rivkah passed a beis midrash, Yaakov struggled to come out. When she passed a place of avodah zarah, Esav struggled to come out. Disturbed by what she was experiencing, Rivkah said, “Im kein, lamah zeh anochi?” and went to seek an explanation from Hashem.
The Ma’ayan HaShavua, quoting the Belzer Rebbe, Rav Yehoshua zt”l, asks: Why was Rivkah so troubled? She knew that two children from the same family could turn out very differently. Kayin and Hevel were brothers, as were Shem and Cham. Rivkah herself was a tzaddeikes, while her brother Lavan followed a very different path. Why couldn’t she assume that she was carrying two children, each with his own nature?
The Belzer Rebbe explains that this pregnancy was different. Rivkah had been an akarah, unable to have children. Only after Yitzchak poured out his heart in tefillah did Hashem grant them a child. Rivkah could understand how children born naturally might follow different paths. But these children were coming into the world through such powerful tefillos. How could a pregnancy brought about in this way contain a child who was already reaching toward avodah zarah?
Hashem answered her, “Shnei goyim b’vitneich… u’le’om mil’om ye’ematz” — two nations are in your womb, and one nation will become stronger than the other. According to this explanation, Hashem was revealing that the struggle between these two children had a purpose. Yaakov was destined for tremendous greatness, and the opposition of Esav would be part of his growth. By facing that opposition and overcoming it, Yaakov would reach his shleimus.
Rav Yeruchem Levovitz zt”l, the Mashgiach of Mir, explains the importance of struggle in avodas Hashem. A person grows when he has to work against something pulling him in the opposite direction. Just as a muscle becomes stronger by working against resistance, a person strengthens his ruchniyus by overcoming a challenge. Esav would present Yaakov with difficult struggles, and those struggles would give Yaakov the opportunity to strengthen his emunah, refine his middos, and grow in his service of Hashem.
This also helps us understand a story told about the Chazon Ish. Someone once praised a talmid chacham by saying that he had no yetzer hara. The Chazon Ish objected: “Zeh eino shevach kol ikar” — that is not a praise at all. The greatness of a person is seen in the effort he puts into overcoming his yetzer hara. Having a struggle does not take away from his greatness. Overcoming it is part of what makes him great.
The Brisker Rav offers another explanation of Rivkah’s question, based on the Gemara in Berachos (10a). Yeshayahu Hanavi told Chizkiyahu Hamelech that he deserved punishment because he had not fulfilled the mitzvah of pru u’rvu. Chizkiyahu explained that he had seen through ruach hakodesh that his children would be wicked. Yeshayahu answered that Hashem’s calculations were not his concern. His responsibility was to fulfill the mitzvah and leave the results to Hashem.
In connection with this, Rav Meir Soloveitchik related that after World War I, when many young people were leaving the ways of Torah, the Chofetz Chaim sometimes refrained from giving a brachah to those who asked for children. There was a distinction between fulfilling an obligation and asking for a special brachah. A person who was commanded in pru u’rvu still had to fulfill the mitzvah, despite his concerns about the future. Asking for a brachah for children under those circumstances was a separate matter.
With this distinction, the Brisker Rav explains Rivkah’s words, “Lamah zeh anochi?” Rivkah feared that she was carrying a child who would grow up to serve avodah zarah. Had she been commanded in pru u’rvu, she would have had to fulfill her obligation and leave the outcome to Hashem. But a woman is not commanded in this mitzvah. Why, then, was she going through the pain of pregnancy to bring such a child into the world?
But how did Hashem’s answer resolve her concern? Telling her that she was carrying two children did not seem to answer her fear about Esav.
Rav Yosef Weinman shlit”a explains that the answer lies in the purpose of the struggle. Rivkah was being told that Esav’s presence would play a role in Yaakov’s growth. She was carrying Yaakov Avinu, the future father of the Shevatim, together with the opposition through which he would develop his greatness. The struggle she felt was already the beginning of that process. Her suffering had a purpose that she could not yet see.
This gives us a different way to look at our own struggles. A boy may find it difficult to concentrate on his learning, hold back an angry word, or do what is right when others are pulling him in another direction. He may think that if he were better, it would all come easily. But the effort itself is precious. Each time he overcomes the difficulty, he strengthens himself.
The struggle does not mean that he cannot become great. It may be the very opportunity through which he will grow.