In this week’s parshah, the Torah describes the tefillos of Yitzchak Avinu and Rivka Imeinu for a child, after long years of waiting. The passuk states that Yitzchak davened “in the presence of” his wife. The Rebbe R’ Yaakov David of Amshinov ztz”l explains that Yitzchak davened in Rivka’s presence because he considered her to be greater than him, given that she had overcome the immense challenge of growing up surrounded by reshaim and remained a tzaddekes. Rivka, meanwhile, davened “in the presence of” her husband, considering him greater than her as not only was he a tzaddik but also the son of one.
Yitzchak and Rivka provide us here with an example of each spouse seeing the good in the other, even when they could have easily noticed and focused on their own righteousness and qualities instead.
If only we could all see the good in our spouses and in their actions, and even when there are difficulties, instead of noticing the other person’s contribution to the problem, take note of what we can do to improve the situation and resolve any issues. It’s not easy for us to emulate the Avos and Imahos, and it’s so much easier to excuse our own failings than it is to excuse the failings of others and focus only on their strengths. However, when we attempt and even partially succeed in overcoming our innate biases and seek out the good points in others, we will be’ezras Hashem have so much more siyatta diShmaya and blessing in all our relationships.
