Very often, it’s the fragile, sensitive children who need special attention given to their needs, and because they tend to have a more emotional response to issues, they have to be addressed responsibly. While children who are less sensitive might often appear easier and simpler to parent, wise parents will accept all their children exactly as they are, and not resent one child’s greater needs. It can help to be aware that sensitive children often have the most potential, and catering to their sensitivities responsibly, is extremely rewarding.
However, even when parents do everything right, sensitive children can still feel insecure and worry that they aren’t loved or appreciated enough. This is why parents of sensitive children must be careful not to fall into the trap of only giving love and withholding necessary guidance. A parent who keeps giving love, compliments and praise, might be asked by the child one day for something far too difficult, expensive, or time-consuming, and the parent knows he should say “no” but feels pressured to say “yes” instead. After all, he’s invested so much time and energy in showing this child how much he’s loved — and now he’s going to ruin it all by turning down his request?
A sensitive child — like any child, in fact — is also likely to use manipulative statements such as, “If you really loved me, you would give me X.” While their intention in using such words is to get their way, they are also being sincere, to a degree, due to their insecurities and doubts. Nonetheless, it is a terrible mistake to give in to such emotional manipulation. Allowing a child to take charge of decision-making is terrible for his own development and certainly also for the parent’s position in the family. This is aside from the fact that it can only be a temporary solution. Eventually, you will reach a point where it is simply impossible to say “yes” to a request.
At the same time, getting angry at a child who makes excessive demands is also wrong. It’s understandable, but still mistaken, for a parent in such a situation to respond, “After I already gave you so much, how can you claim that I don’t love you simply because I can’t give you this one thing?” A parent who feels so cornered might give up and decide to withdraw the extra love and attention he was giving, and this would also be a terrible shame. It’s so important to remain loving and still know how to turn down a demand gently, yet confidently.
