By Sarah Chana Radcliffe
Not everyone is a morning person and yet SOMEONE has to get the kids ready...
Not everyone is a "morning person." This means that some mothers are not "morning people." And yet they have numerous morning responsibilities that come along with motherhood. There are others who konk out early in the evening, long before the evening responsibilities are over. There are many who are "low energy" in general and can't keep up with the ongoing, endless, exhausting tasks of parenthood. When the job exceeds our natural abilities, we can certainly stretch ourselves a little. But we simply won't be able to accomplish what someone else might be able to accomplish. We need to help ourselves work around our limitations so that we don't push ourselves into illness and/or emotional dysregulation. Sometimes we can swap responsibilities with a spouse. A "morning spouse" might do the morning run, for example, in exchange for the "night owl spouse" taking responsibility for the night shift. Sometimes we can hire extra help (even in the form of one of our own kids). Sometimes we can minimize what has to be done. Although there may not be a perfect solution, self-compassion reduces suffering. We're all different, each with our own set of strengths and weaknesses. We can't let ourselves off the hook but we can't turn ourselves into someone else. We just need to do what we can do to meet the needs of our loved ones in the best way that we can.
