In the wake of the tragic events that unfolded in Israel on Simchat Torah and the subsequent battles in Gaza and the north, well over a thousand Israeli lives have been lost. As the nation grapples with this immense loss, a pressing question arises: Who will say Kaddish, the Jewish prayer for the deceased, for these fallen individuals?
One of the most sacred rituals observed by all Jews throughout the generations is the practice of reciting the Mourner's Kaddish prayer for the merit of the departed soul of one's father or mother. It is said at the funeral, during the week of mourning (shiva), for the following 11 months, and then every year on the anniversary of passing. When the child of the deceased is unable to recite Kaddish, or if they did not have a child, Kaddish will often be recited by another relative, or by an individual who was hired or volunteered to do so.
The immense scale of the tragedy in Israel meant that there were now many families who needed assistance in fulfilling this essential ritual. Some of the victims were parents of young children, too young to recite Kaddish. Others are unable to make it to a synagogue daily. And shockingly, in some cases, entire families were murdered, leaving no one behind to say Kaddish.
Not honoring the memories of the victims, and the IDF soldiers who were killed in the months since, was not an option. A network of volunteers has stepped up to ensure that Kaddish is recited for every victim, memorializing and honoring them throughout the entire year of mourning.
At the forefront of this initiative is Dror-David Amos, a 43-year-old former IDF logistics officer from Nesher. Born into a traditional family, Amos served in the military for 25 years, during which he became closer to Jewish observance. Upon returning to Nesher after his military service, Amos became involved with prayer services and Torah classes at the local synagogue.
Amos says his journey was not marked by any dramatic religious awakening. "I have no special or unusual story of becoming religious," he explains. "No journeys to the East, no dramatic turnaround." Instead, his connection to faith developed gradually. During his military service, he would read Tehillim - Psalms, a practice he attributes to his grandmother's prayers. "She and my grandfather were tzadikim – truly righteous, and to me it seems that their spiritual effect is what awakened my soul," Amos reflects.
Amos’s experiences in the military, particularly his close observation of how the military's casualty department works with bereaved families, led him to recognize a gap in civilian bereavement support.
"I realized that civilian bereaved families lack a comparable support system; after the funeral, they return home and must face their grief alone," he says.
So, to fill that gap, Amos, along with a group of non-commissioned and commissioned officers, established "Chesed Chaim V'Emet." This volunteer-based organization aims to support bereaved families, essentially adapting the IDF model for civilian use. "We simply copied the IDF model to civilian life," Amos explains.
In the aftermath of the October 7th massacre, the volunteer network experienced a significant expansion. In collaboration with other organizations, they managed to reach out to more than 800 bereaved families, providing support, food baskets, and assistance in setting up mourning tents.
The Kaddish initiative emerged from this broader support system. The organization offers to recruit special volunteers to say Kaddish for fallen individuals whose families may not have someone to perform this ritual.
"We saw how important it was for families that someone would be reciting Kaddish on behalf of their loved ones," Amos notes.
One poignant example involves a widow in the north whose husband fell in battle. When a volunteer from Rechasim came to offer condolences, she pointed to her young children sitting in the corner of the living room and said, "They are still young, and it's important to me that someone says Kaddish for my husband." The organization promptly found a volunteer to fulfill this request.
The initiative has created unexpected connections between volunteers and bereaved families. Several months ago, the organization sent a representative to the shiva (seven-day mourning period) of Vadim Blich, who fell in the battle of Be'eri. His widow, Ortal, requested that someone say Kaddish for her husband. The same day, they informed her that a volunteer named Eitan Meisels had stepped up to do so.
Ortal expressed how touched and encouraged she was by the knowledge that someone who had never met Vadim volunteered to say Kaddish for him as if he were a close relative. A few weeks later, the story took an unexpected turn when Eitan's son, Nitai, a tank soldier, fell in the battles in Gaza. Eitan joined the ranks of bereaved parents, and his connection with Vadim's family transformed into a shared destiny. Now, Eitan says Kaddish for both Vadim and his own son.
As the list of fallen soldiers and civilians continues to grow, reaching over 1,450 at the time of writing, the need for volunteers also increases. Amos pledges to continue his efforts, ensuring the proper respect for every single victim of the horrific attack, who were killed for being Jews living on their homeland, and the IDF soldiers, who were killed protecting the Jewish nation and the Holy Land. May G-d avenge their blood.
