What Do You Do When Your Tefilos Don’t “Work”?
TRUE STORY
A Yungerman was paid a free ticket to come to an out-of-town community to spend Shabbos there and be Mashpia (have positive influence) on them. He was an A-1 and much celebrated public speaker. He davened a lot that Hashem should help him make a great speech, and bring lots of: השפעות טובות (goodness from Shamayim) to the Olam (crowd). However, the first night he spoke, he noticed plenty of people leaving in the middle, and/or falling asleep on him (seems like the davening didn’t work...? What do you do now??).
He was looking through his notes, and at his diary full of Hashgacha Pratis stories, when he noticed that many years ago he had had the same exact predicament. Instead of kvetching to Hashem, he had thanked Him for the “great speech” that he made, and how they all loved him and begged him to come again. Also, in his notes he had once mentioned how he had davened for something, and what he asked for simply didn’t happen. He had been greatly disappointed, so he decided: העקשן יצליח the stubborn will be Matzliach, and he davened again, and he had a Yeshua. So he davened again, which involved going against his nature to be Mya'esh and give up.
The next time he spoke he was a major “hit”! They loved his speech and he became very popular with them.
Insist On Seeing Only Positive, And the Negative Can Disappear on Its Own
AMAZING TRUE STORY
A Yungerman was having loads of aggravation from his teenage daughter who was growing ultra long hair. Instead of saying anything to her, he spent a long-time thanking Hashem for giving him such a wonderful child “who davens, and says Tehilim, and has friends, and good marks, and helps in the house, etc.” He didn’t even say to Hashem: “But! Can you please teach her more Tz'niyus concerning her hair style?!”
He just thanked and thanked and thanked for all her Maalos, and ignored her Chisaron completely. The very next day, he was driving to New York and his daughter was sitting in the back seat. He turned around to look at her, and he noticed that she had taken a major haircut; and now she had a Tz'niyus hairstyle!
Look how much power there is in insisting to see only positive, and how the negative can disappear on its own.
We need to work on the concept of Churban in our own lives. When people criticize others and even themselves, often it comes from bad Middos. Just as we want a new and rebuilt Bais Hamikdash [may it be rebuilt speedily in our days], so too we need to be builder-type people, not destroyers like Nevuchadnetzar. We need to build ourselves up, and the people around us as well.
