It is known that we must have hakaras hatov. When someone does you a favor, you must feel indebted to him, seek to help him, and certainly never harm him.
We are even obligated to have hakaras hatov towards animals when they help us. Many readers saw the photograph of Reb Elyah Lopian zt'l giving a dish of milk to a cat. This is the real story behind the picture: The bachurim who learned in yeshivas Kfar Chassidim were bothered by the many rats that nibbled at their food and got into their belongings. They brought a cat to the yeshiva campus, and the cat got rid of all the rats.
After the mission was accomplished, the bachurim wanted to send the cat away. Reb Elyah Lopian zt'l was the mashgiach of Kfar Chassidim, and he told the bachurim that they must first show hakaras hatov to the cat. The picture of Reb Elyah giving milk to the cat is how he showed the cat hakaras hatov for helping the bachurim, and then they sent the cat away.
The Yerushalmi (Terumos 8:3) tells: Someone invited a talmid chacham for a meal. At the meal, the host brought his dog and had the dog sit down next to the host. The talmid chacham asked, "Is there a reason you are disgracing me?" The baal habayis replied, "Chas v'shalom! It is simply that I owe a favor to this dog. Once, kidnappers came to the city. They intended to catch people and sell them as slaves. One of the kidnappers wanted to take my wife. This dog bit him...and the kidnapper left us in peace. Therefore, I must honor this dog."
We've seen that we must show hakaras hatov to people who do us favors, and even to animals. What about domeim, inanimate objects? Must we have hakaras hatov towards them too? The answer is yes. Our obligation to have hakaras hatov is even for domeim, objects that don’t have feelings.
We can prove this from the makos in Mitzrayim. Moshe Rabbeinu performed most makos, but the first three makos – דם צפרדע כינים – were performed by Aharon HaKohen. Why didn’t Moshe do those? Rashi (Shemos 7:19) explains that as an infant, Moshe was cast in the Nile to be saved from the Egyptians who were killing all the newborns. The Nile saved him, and therefore, Moshe couldn’t bring plagues on the Nile (צפרדע דם). It had to be done by his brother Aharon.
Similarly, about כינים מכת Rashi (Shemos 8:12) writes, "It wasn't appropriate that Moshe should hit the earth since the earth protected Moshe..." because when Moshe killed the Mitzri, he buried him in the sand. Therefore, Aharon hit the earth and brought forth the כינים. It wasn't proper for Moshe to bring a plague onto the earth that protected him.
The Nile and the earth don’t have feelings, yet Moshe couldn’t bring a makah on them. He had to have hakaras hatov even for a domeim (inanimate).
The Shita Mikubetzes (Bava Kama 92:) writes, "A student of the Ri Migash z'l wrote the following: "The Gemara (Bava Kama 92:) says, דשתית בירא קלא ביה תרמי לא מיניה. If you drank water from a well, don’t throw in a stone or any other matter. Don’t disregard it, and don’t do anything bad to it because you once benefited from it. The Gemara is using a well as a mashal for all matters: If you gained benefit and pleasure from something, it isn't proper to damage it..."
[This lesson shows us that we should have hakaras hatov for inanimate items. The well doesn’t have feelings or care if someone throws in a stone. But if we benefited from the well, we mustn’t disgrace it.]
"Rabbeinu (the R'i MiGash) told a story that happened with his Rebbe, the Ri'f. Someone asked the Ri'f to be his judge, and the Ri'f emphatically refused. This was the reason: "There was a time when the Ri'f z'l was ill, and he went to the home of someone who had a bathhouse. The Ri'f bathed there and it was very good for his health. The owner of the bathhouse asked the Ri'f to stay in his home until he was fully cured, and the host honored the Ri'f immensely until the Ri'f recovered.
"As time passed, this person [who hosted the Ri'f] lost his money and suffered from hunger, etc. He was deeply in debt. His financial situation became so bad, he had to sell the bathhouse to pay back his debts. The Ri'f said, 'I won't judge anything that has to do with the bathhouse, such as regarding its sale or evaluating its value because I enjoyed this bathhouse. He said this about a bathhouse, which has no feelings."
The Ri Migash adds that if the Ri'f was cautious not to judge a bathhouse, indeed, how cautious one must be not to be the judge for a human being who helped you. He writes "It would be wrong to judge [the person who did a favor for you]. Whoever does has left the path of mussar and derech eretz. Chazal say, ליה דרחים למאן לא איניש לידון לא ליה דסני למאן ולא, 'A person shouldn’t judge someone he loves or someone he hates.' There are two reasons why you shouldn’t judge someone you love: One is because you might bend the judgment in favor of your friend you love. And if you can be cautious with your soul and you can judge correctly, nevertheless, it is wrong to judge your friend, because you will be, טובה תחת רעה משלם, paying bad to someone who did kindness with you."
The Ri MiGash concludes that our primary hakaras hatov should go to Hashem. He writes, "Hashem bestows perfect goodness on us. Kal v'chomer it is proper that we praise Hashem with perfect praises, and that we shouldn’t do anything that will get Hashem angry, and we shouldn’t do anything that Hashem hates."
Because when one trains himself in the attribute of hakaras hatov for domeim, for animals, and certainly for human beings, he will also have hakaras hatov for Hashem, for all the kindness He bestows on us.
Story of the Steipler Gaon and Reb Dardak
Reb Dardak oversaw the Steipler gaon’s sefarim distribution in America. Sometimes, Reb Dardak would write letters to the Steipler, and the Steipler would answer him.
Years passed, and the Steipler gaon's sefarim started being distributed through the stores like all sefarim, and Reb Dardak’s services were no longer needed. Also, at that time, the Steipler stopped answering letters. He was weaker and had become world-renowned as the gadol of Klan Yisrael, and it was impossible to answer the many letters people sent him.
One day, the Steipler received a letter from Reb Dardak. The Steipler decided to make an exception and answer him. He wrote a letter and brought it to Reb Dardak's father's home (Reb Chaim Shmaryahu Dardak from Bnei Brak), and the Steipler asked him to send it to his son in America.
Reb Chaim Shmaryahu was surprised that the Steipler wrote the letter and took the effort to bring it to his home. The Steipler explained, "I don’t write letters anymore, but I made an exception this time. I didn’t want your son to think that I only responded to his letters when I needed his services, and now that I don’t need his distribution, I stopped writing to him." Reb Chaim Shmaryahu assured the Steipler that he would send the letter.
A few days later, on erev Shabbos, the Steipler knocked on Reb Chaim Shmaryahu Dardak's door again. "Did you send the letter yet?" the Steipler asked. "No." "Good. I wrote another letter and want you to send this one." Astounded, Reb Chaim Shmaryahu asked, "Is this letter different than the first letter you gave me?" "No. They are the same. I'll explain: I don’t want you to send the first letter, because I wrote it for the wrong reasons. I wrote the first letter so your son shouldn’t think negatively of me. But that isn't the right reason to write a letter. I should write to your son because I have hakaras hatov for distributing my sefer. Therefore, I wrote a second letter. The words are the same, but the intention is improved."
