There was once an older, well-off couple who lived comfortably and had one only daughter, a girl of exemplary middos, who had dormed in a high school outside their city. When she began dating, her parents were prepared to invest a fortune to secure a boy with yiras shomayim who was learning full-time, even offering to buy a spacious apartment for a top boy.
The first boy suggested made an excellent impression, and the couple could have become engaged, but the girl had a stipulation: after marriage they would travel once a week to visit her parents, and if the boy would not explicitly promise to comply, she was not prepared to get engaged.
When the boy heard this condition, he replied that he did not know if he could agree to such a thing. Of course, they would visit her parents, but committing to a weekly visit, especially since they would not be living in the same city, was a major obligation that could be very difficult to keep. He said that if she would forego this condition, he was ready to make a vort, but she refused to relent.
Her parents were offering a generous dowry and a beautiful apartment, yet she felt they were obligated to visit at least once a week, particularly since she was their only daughter. The boy did not want to accept an obligation he could not guarantee to fulfill, and the shidduch ended.
Sometime later, another shidduch was suggested, and once again, after the couple had met several times and reached an understanding, the girl raised her stipulation that he must agree to visiting her parents weekly, and this boy, too, declined to accept such an obligation.
The third time a shidduch was suggested, the boy already knew from the outset about her condition, having heard about it from a friend who had met her. He was deeply impressed by her middos and yiras shomayim and wanted to proceed. When she presented her stipulation, he responded, “I’m amazed that you’re asking to visit your parents only once a week. After all, they are your parents and you are their only daughter. I think we should visit them twice a week.”
His answer astonished her, and she was overjoyed, feeling she had finally found the right boy. The chasunah took place three months later, and the couple moved into their new apartment. During the first two months they visited her parents once a week, but then she told her husband that she felt once every two weeks would be sufficient, as it was difficult to travel so often while working daily and managing the home. A few months later, he found himself begging her to make the trip even once every few weeks, and only after much pleading did she agree to visit every so often. (Meant To Be)
Reprinted from the Parshas Yisro 5786 email of The Weekly Vort.
