Acts of kindness to another person lay the foundation for a relationship. When a person sees that someone cares about his physical needs, he is much more likely to trust them in spiritual matters as well.
A frum woman once moved into a new home only to discover that her next-door neighbor was a bitter, antagonistic irreligious Jew. The woman next door did everything in her power to make the lives of her religious neighbors miserable, including calling the police for the mildest of infractions.
But the frum family devised an ingenious plan to put an end to her belligerence: they decided to overwhelm her with kindness. A steady succession of flower bouquets, mishloach manos, and simchah invitations melted her opposition, and she eventually became a close friend of the family and took an avid interest in Yiddishkeit and the Torah.
But let us not make the mistake of thinking that a public chessed is more valuable than one performed in private. After all, a public display of a mitzvah seems like the most effective way to make a kiddush Hashem.
Yet the exact opposite is true. The most praiseworthy tzedakah is that which is given in secret, without no one aware of the donor’s identity. The navi teaches us that the ideal way to observe the Torah is v’hatzneia leches im Elokecha, to walk modestly with Hashem (Michah 6:8).
Reproduced from Living Kiddush Hashem by Rabbi Shraga Freedman with permission of the copyright holders, ArtScroll/Mesorah Publications, Ltd.
