ויקח יוסף את שניהם את אפרים בימינו משמאל ישראל ואת מנשה בשמאלו מימין ישראל ויגש אליו . וישלח ישראל את ימינו וישת על ראש אפרים והוא הצעיר ואת שמאלו על ראש מנשה שכל את ידיו כי מנשה הבכור .
Yosef took the two of them — Ephraim with his right hand, to Yisrael’s left, and Menashe with his left, to Yisrael’s right — and he drew close to him. But Yisrael extended his right hand and laid it on Ephraim’s head though he was the younger and his left hand on Menashe’s head. He moved his hands with intelligence, for Menashe was the firstborn. (Bereishis 48:13–14)
When Yaakov realized that Ephraim, the one he deemed greater, was on his left, why did he have to switch his hands? Couldn’t he have switched the position of the boys themselves?
In addition, the words he later said to his grandsons are the blessings we give to our children (v. 20). Why?
According to the Chizkuni, Yaakov did not want Menashe to feel bad. He knew that Ephraim deserved the better position, but he did not want Menashe to suffer the indignity of being moved around; he was, after all, the firstborn and deserving of a certain amount of respect. For this reason, he used his wisdom, his שכל (as in the shoresh of שכל את ידיו), and merely switched his hands.
But perhaps we can give a different answer. Yaakov wanted to convey to his grandsons an important message: It’s not where you are that will determine what you will be, but what you do and what you make of yourself. As the Gemara (Ta’anis 21b) teaches: “Lo mekomo shel adam mechabdo ella adam mechabeid es mekomo — A person is not honored by his place; rather, the person is the one who brings honor to his place.” If you rely only on the place that you are in — even if you are in the right place — without investing your own effort, you may not amount to much. The place alone will not bring honor to you!
The contrary is true, as well. Even if you are in the wrong place, the place you occupy does not have to have any bearing on your future achievements. Although you may have grown up on the wrong side of the tracks and lack the wealth, smarts, and looks usually associated with greatness, with real, sustained effort, it can be achieved. And you will bring honor to the place!
Yaakov wished to communicate to his grandchildren that Ephraim’s greatness was not because of his placement, but because of Ephraim himself. Greatness can be attained even without moving. Achievement and accomplishment come from the effort of the person, not from where he grew up or what or whom he grew up with.
In addition, Menashe saw that Ephraim was being elevated and afforded great honor. Although he was the bechor, and not Ephraim, he did not say a word. He listened to what Yaakov said and did not complain. His father, Yosef, was the one who attempted to reposition Yaakov’s hands, but Menashe said nothing.
These are among the lessons we are trying to teach our own children, as well. One, what you become has nothing to do with where you come from; it is only up to you. And two, what is not yours is not worth fretting over or fighting over.
This can be why this berachah became the blessing with which we bless our sons. If we can imbue our children with these two perspectives, we have truly given them a most remarkable gift.
In addition, these two messages are essentially the thrust of the following well-known prayer: “G-d, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And the wisdom to know the difference.” One final note on childrearing based on the switching of Yaakov’s hands: We must teach our children based on their position, based on where they are. Yaakov did not move the children around; he moved his own hands around. The parent, rebbi, or mentor must go to the child and teach him based on his own way, and not pigeonhole the child based on the teacher’s own thoughts and needs. (R’ Avraham Bukspan, Classics and Beyond 2)
