The turn over
מאת ר' ש. קאפלין שליט"א
and then later into a כבשן של אש to kill him.
Writes the רמב"ן: When he came to חרן he came to מנוחה, in חרן they knew him, he spoke the language, in חרן he finally came to a דרגה of מנוחה. At that point, writes the רמב"ן, when he had just settled down, הקב"ה tells him, "לך לך" – Go! Move place!
In אברהם אבינו’s position at 74 years old, his world had was turned upside down, he had just settled in חרן – this was his homeland after all, and now he was told to move with his whole life being turned upside down.
A person could think to himself, “A new place! It’s going to be terrible there! A new language! A new type of people! It’s going to be very difficult…”
However, הקב"ה told him, "כאן אי אתה זוכה לבנים" – here you cannot merit children, to merit children you have to move away from here.
At the age of 74, אברהם אבינו moved to a completely new place, this was a whole new chapter in his life, and in ארץ ישראל he had children, the אבות הקדושים, a משה רבינו, a ארץ ישראל ,מתן תורה , it all began now in this new place – כאן אתה זוכה לבנים, his whole future happened in a new place at an old age, all what we have today started then, the רשב"א and ר' עקיבא איגר, the history of כלל ישראל which we know of started in this weeks סדרה, in a new place.
A new place
The story is told about a איד who came back after the second world war from the camps to his hometown, he had lost everything, his life was gone, he lost his wife and all his children, they were all killed in the holocaust.
When he returned from the camps – nebech after four years of גיהנם on this world, he arrived in his hometown and went to the house he had lived in, hoping that he will find some מנוחה there, to rebuild his shattered life.
He came to the house, everything was broken, all his belongings were stolen, it was a real חורבן. He lay on the floor for three days and did not stop crying, the איד would say over, “I never cried in the camps because I always said to myself, ‘I still have a home to return to one day, I’ll go home one day, things will become better in the future…’ but now I see I haven’t even got that…” After coming back and seeing he hasn’t even got a home, he cried for three days.
When he finished crying, he thought to himself, “I must make for myself a new place…” He went to America, married there, grandchildren and great grandchildren. He became very successful in פרנסה there together with setting up a huge family all שומרי תורה ומצוות .
At the time when he was crying on the floor, he could have never imagined how in a new מקום – in a new place there was a whole new life waiting for him, he never dreamt of it.
This איד also had a sister who survived the war but she unfortunately stayed in Poland and began assimilating with the גוים there.
When this איד was in his nineties, leading a huge משפחה who were שומרי תורה ומצוות, he managed to invite his sister to come and live with him in America. It was ערב פסח and finally they had managed to bring her over. She came to
had
children
many
the ליל הסדר after not seeing a סדר for nearly sixty years, she was tremendously נתרגש from the סדר, she saw how his brother had such a big משפחה and she herself had nothing.
After יום טוב they told her to stay in America where they would look after her.
She told them, “I’ve done so many עבירות in the last fifty years… if I stay here, I will be עובר on another עבירה of קנאה, I won’t be able to be סובל the jealousy…”
This is a story which we really see so often, many of our grandparents or great grandparents came here before or after the war, they came to a new place, and they all had a gevaldiga future ahead of them, bringing up wonderful משפחות who are שומרי תורה ומצוות , they came with nothing – בחוסר כל, at the time they didn’t know what was in store for them, wherever אידן went after the war, whether it was here in England or America or ארץ ישראל, but we see so clearly how in a new מקום they all received gevaldiga הצלחות. For those nebech who stayed behind, it turned into "כאן אי אתה זוכה לבניו", there was a need for a new מקום and there said הקב"ה, "אתה זוכה לבנים". A new place can bring a completely different future.
A spiritual new place
How is this נוגע to us? This is נוגע to us in a different way, we are not told to move place, we don’t have to go find new מקומות in order to make a fresh start.
However, there is an element of this in our lives, when we are set in a certain pace or a certain type of life, when we slip into a very comfortable mode and we want to continue our lives with the terms which we have at the moment, “okay… I have a few bad מידות… I have a bit of כעס but nu nu…” We often have those feelings that we want to serve הקב"ה from where we are – from the present matzev we are in, and very often we deny ourselves the opportunity from being in a different place, and being in a different place is an opportunity to have a completely different future.
People say to themselves, “There is nothing to change for, I’m happy how things are going well by me now…”
But we must internalize this message: כאן אי אתה זוכה לבנים, often we’re set in our ways on a certain course, we’re not prepared to put ourselves into a different place – we’re not prepared to change ourselves, we must realisw that putting ourselves in a different place can bring to a different נצחיות , every single person in fifty, sixty year’s time can be a patriarch of hundreds of people, and the place we put ourselves now in our עבודת השם is going to define this dynasty that were going to בעז"ה bring to this world.
How do we go about finding a new place for ourselves.
Be a mench!
There is only one way to change our place, thinking about it is not going to make it happen, there is only one way to do it properly. I heard myself from the Manchester ראש ישיבה זצ"ל, “A mench who does not learn מוסר everyday is not a mench!” He meant if a person doesn’t learn מוסר and does not work on changing himself by moving himself to a new place, he is not a human being.
We think to ourselves, ‘מוסר is an extra סדר… we learn shtark the rest of the day but the מוסר סדר is just a תוספת…’ Of course, the עיקר חלק of our day is learning תורה, as ר' חיים מוואלאז'ין זצ"ל writes in length how לימוד המוסר should only be a short Seder, however, without this “small seder” a mench is not a mench, without it our entire day will not bring us to where we’re supposed to get to. The little bit of מוסר will bring you to a new place and therefore a different future, if we are מזלזל in it we won’t reach this new place, כאן אי אתה זוכה לבנים, whereas if we bring ourselves to a new place spiritually, we can become a completely different person with a completely different future, and will feel a real feeling of fullfillment.
A Novardok Yeshiva during מוסר סדר and exclaimed shouting Meshugoyim
person
walked
a
prewar
seeing screaming, ”, Novardok answered him, “yes they come in Meshuga but leave Menshen”
We see so many times when בחורים who come into ישיבה, we inquire about them, we hear about this and we hear about that – כל מיני חסרונות, and they come into ישיבה and the בחור takes his daily מוסר seriously, and then we see a phenomenal change, a few years later when he leaves the ישיבה he is a different person, he is in a new מקום, he is in a completely different place with a whole different future ahead of him, this is achieved through לימוד המוסר and taking the
after
everyone “it’s Alter
a of
Hois
Shmuessen seriously and working on changing.
Monday פרשת אמור
I would like to share with you a story which is connected to what we spoke about last week and what we are speaking about this week. ר' יענקי שרייבער נ''י who read the story of the בבא סאלי last week phoned me on מצאי שבת to tell me the following story which he heard from הר''ר יוסף וויענברג שליט"א who said over this story by a שבע ברכות, after הר''ר משה האמברגר שליט"א – a חשוב'ער Rov and Rosh Yeshiva from Lakewood said to the עולם, “…I know all three people in the story personally… it’s a true story…”
There a איד in America – a great תלמיד חכם in Lakewood who is one of the big farherers on שולחן ערוך, יורה דעה, אורח חיים, אבן העזר or חושן משפט.
One day a yungerman comes in who is at the end of his twenties. The איד asks, “Which חלק of שולחן ערוך do you want to be tested on?” The yungerman replies, “On the whole …”שולחן ערוך
The איד was shocked – he had never heard such a response in his life, there was a time when such a thing was
whether it’s
happenned, but in today’s world it’s very unusual.
He starts ferhering him, and he knows it all, he couldn’t catch him out, not in יורה דעה and not in חושן משפט , he ממש knew it all, he had never seen such a thing in his life, a איד in his twenties who knew the whole שולחן ערוך ישוב והפוך .
After giving him his סמיכה, the farherer decided to call up the father of the איד to give him some נחת and to tell him how impressed he was.
“I just farherd your son,” he tells the father, “I’m ממש blown away… was your son born like this?! What was he like as a בחור is he a born עילוי?”
Says the father, “This boy was an average boy just like everyone else, he was supposed to do, just normal.
He went to ישיבה קטנה where he did very well there for over a year and a half.
One day, פרשת אמור on Monday morning after קריאת התורה the גבאי told him to do . הגבהה
He goes to the ספר תורה and he does a farkerter הגבה (like we do on שמחת תורה). In the middle of the year! פרשת אמור! You can imagine how everyone jumped up in laughter… everyone was laughing,
motivated,
did
he
the rest of davening was a complete disaster. After davening the משגיח calls him over and tells him, “You can pack your bags and go home…”
The משגיח let him sweat over it for a few hours until in the afternoon he called him up to come around to his house.
He comes around to the משגיח’s house and the משגיח asks him, “What were you thinking? Why did you make a farketer הגבה? You think it’s שמחת תורה?! Are you okay?”
He tells him, “Stam… for the shtick I did it…”
The משגיח tells him, “I’m sorry but it doesn’t make any sense, I’ve known you for a year and a half already…”
He tells the משגיח, “Neh… it was stam…”
The משגיח did not give up, he pressed him and pressed him until he tells the משגיח, “Okay, it seems I have no choice, I have to get back into ישיבה so I will tell you the story.”
[When I was in Gateshead ישיבה every week a different בחור would lein on Monday and Thursday (we taka have to מכיר טובה to our בעל קורא in ישיבה who leins for us for us every week so beautifully,) most בחורים would lein well, and often it would happen when we had בחורים who would lein and to put it in a nice way, they weren’t too musical, it wasn’t always the ideal situation.]
In this ישיבה, by every קריאת התורה a different בחור would lein. There was a בחור in ישיבה who wasn’t too musical and the גבאי would test him to see how well he could do it. The בחור was desperate to lein so the גבאי gave him ten week’s notice to prepare for Monday morning leining on פרשת אמור.
Monday morning arrives, the בחור starts leining… he started with the tune of הפטרה and then he went to the tune of איכה… you can imagine how the בחורים found it funny, it was a big ליצנות.
Said my son to the משגיח, “I felt so bad for the poor בחור, he was so red in the face, I thought to myself, ‘I’m going to divert their attention…I’m going to do something which will make them forget about what happened…’ just then the גבאי gave me הגבהה so there and then I decided to do a farkerter הגבה…”
The משגיח couldn’t believe it, he gave the בחור a kiss, he was truly impressed to see such wonderful מידות of the בחור.”
Said the father to this ferherer, “You should know, from that day on his head suddenly changed, he never forgot anything, mastering דפים with a teef-kite, after a year he was a tremendous תלמיד חכם… he had become a different person.”
This is the same idea to what we mentioned last week, the ענין of breaking ones מידות, of giving up of oneself for somebody else – thinking of person, and with this a person taka sees gevaldiga ישועות, it brings down big השפעות from שמים.
But today I would like to bring out another נקודה from this story, this בחור who is a great תלמיד חכם today who knows שולחן ערוך ישוב והפוך , he decided, “I’m going to save this boy from embarrassment…” he didn’t have to do anything, anything? He’s not even your משפחה or your friend, but he was מחליט in his mind to save the boy from embarrassment, to do something which will give himself tremendous himself in a new place, and when a person does that, when a person puts himself in a new place in a different place, he becomes a new person.
This is the נקודה we are discussing today: bringing ourselves to a new place and
within
weeks
he
another
who
asked
him
to
do
embarrassment,
he
put
the only way to do this is through לימוד לימוד המוסר ,המוסר is not a joke, it’s a serious thing, if we don’t learn מוסר every day properly we are going to stay in the same place, we can become a different person, we put ourselves into a different place, כאן אתה זוכה, in a new place one can be זוכה on a new level completely, the fulfilment a person gets from making a new place gives a person tremendous שמחה and מנוחה.
Living על קידוש ה'
אברהם אבינו had many נסיונות, with regards to the מעשה עקידה the תורה tells us about it in length in this weeks סדרה, with regards to the נסיון of לך לך מארצך the תורה tells us in last weeks פרשה. However, when it comes to the נסיון of אור כשדים the תורה doesn’t tell us at all about it, besides for a little רמז which חז"ל דרשן in the name "אור כשדים". Why is this so? Why is the נסיון of מסירת נפש in אור כשדים not mentioned at all in the ?תורה
I once heard a moridicker vort: מסירת נפש to jump in the fire is one second, it takes one moment, it’s one "לך לך מארצך" .רגע is a whole new life change event, away from the place I was brought up in, changing myself, it’s a life challenge, shechting your only son is a life challenge, living without your son is a life challenge.
The תורה makes no fuss about the challenge of throwing yourself into a fire. I once saw a saying, “It’s harder to live for Hashem than to die for Hashem.” It’s so true, we say every day, "בכל לבבך ובכל נפשך" – I will be מוסר נפש for you הקב"ה, we taka mean it properly, but when it comes to giving away a bit of time for הקב"ה, to change your מידות, to control yourself for the רבש"ע, that’s already much more of a נסיון, to live על קידוש ה' is much harder.
לך לך and וירא are the נסיונות which are putting oneself in a new place! A place without a son who I waited for so long! Moving away from the place I want to be in to a new place! It’s a life changing challenge, אור כשדים wasn’t a life changing challenge, it happened in one second, that is much easier, the תורה doesn’t speak about it. What’s relevant to us is a life changing challenge – to put ourselves in a new place.
I’m not just saying over some words, it’s something which we really must take to heart. We can all be in a new place, we can make new places for ourselves, we can work on ourselves, learning מוסר gives us the awareness of where we can be, without learning מוסר we don’t even know where we are supposed to be, every person must learn the right מוסר ספר which speaks to them, if a person takes a מוסר ספר and learns it properly, he is being made aware of a completely different place of which he is now, and a person must know, כאן אי אתה זוכה לבנים, if a person creates for himself a new place, he is creating a completely new נצחיות, it’s going to be different type of children which he is going to bring up, his future is going to be different, if somebody stays in their old place like nebech this lady in the story, nothing will come of the person, כאן אי אתה זוכה , a person must internalise that he has tremendous opportunities by coming to a new place.
Bit by bit we can continue changing our place, we see so often how people manage to change their place, with a little bit of strength and effort with allowing ourselves to get to the different places we can be. The חפץ חיים would say, “If one puts cold water into a hot מקוה the מקוה becomes warm. If one puts cold water into a warm מקוה the מקוה becomes cold.” If a person is hot his children will be warm, if he is warm his children will be cold. We must get ourselves into a place which makes us hot, our future depends on it, it will make sure our children are warm, if we are hot it will bring to a different future, just like אברהם אבינו, that is where his future was – in a new place.
Transcribed by Avrohom Dov Kohn – אברהם דוב הכהן כהן
