בראשית לז, כד וַיִקָּחֻהו וַיַשְלִכו אֹתוֹ הַבֹרָּה וְהַבוֹר רֵק אֵין בוֹ מָּיִם:
שבת דף כב/א דרש רב נתן בר מניומי משמיה דרב תנחום מאי דכתיב והבור רק אין בו מים ממשמע שנא' והבור רק איני יודע שאין בו מים אלא מה ת"ל אין בו מים מים אין בו אבל נחשים ועקרבים יש בו
The fact that Yosef was saved from the pit full of snakes and scorpions (and did not die) was a miracle. It has to be that Reuven and the brothers did not know that the pit contained dangerous snakes and scorpions. Usually, a person that goes into such a pit is considered “dead” that the Rabbis permitted his wife to remarry. Reuven did not know, since he used the ploy to put Yosef into a pit, in order to save him later. Also, if the brothers had known that the big miracle had occurred for Yosef (being saved from such a danger), they would not have continued to act callously and sell him to the Midyanim. For one learns from the evil Nevuchadnezer, that after the miraculous survival of Chananya, Mishael and Azaryah, even he had thoughts of Teshuvah.
And the brothers could not see what was in the pit. In Mishniyos Tamid, the term השלכה is used in reference to something that contains over 20 amos. As we have seen from the laws of the Chanukah lights, and a Succah, something past 20 amos is not considered within normal eyesight.
The Going Up of Yehudah
בראשית לח, יג וַיֻגַד לְתָּמָּר לֵאמֹר הִנֵה חָּמִיךְ עֹלֶׁה תִמְנָּתָּה לָּגֹז צֹאנוֹ:
מסכת סוטה דף י/א כתיב וירד שמשון תמנתה וכתיב הנה חמיך עולה תמנתה א"ר אלעזר שמשון שנתגנה בה כתיב ביה ירידה יהודה שנתעלה בה כתיב ביה עליה
The Gemara and Rashi indicate that the Aliyah (going up) in the verse refers to Yehudah, that from this incident children were born to him that lead to kings and prophets. However, the Yerushalmi says the verse refers to Tamar who went to do this act for the sake of Heaven. She was fulfilling the concept of yibum (the opposite of the intent of Shimshon).
Extent of Concept Not to Embarrass Another in Public
בראשית לח, כה הִוא מוצֵאת וְהִיא שָּלְחָּה אֶׁל-חָּמִיהָּ לֵאמֹר לְאִיש אֲשֶׁר -אֵלֶׁה לוֹ אָּנֹכִי הָּרָּה וַתֹאמֶׁר הַכֶׁר-נָּא לְמִי הַחֹתֶׁמֶׁת וְהַפְ תִילִים וְהַמַטֶׁה הָּאֵלֶׁה :
מסכת סוטה דף י/ב נוח לו לאדם שיפיל עצמו לתוך כבשן האש ואל ילבין פני חבירו ברבים מנלן מתמר
Clearly if Yehudah had not spoken, then Tamar would have accepted the death penalty. The reason is that three go down to Gehinom and don’t return. And one of the three is someone who embarrasses another person in public, which Tamar did not wish to do.
Tosfos asks why is this not considered together with the three instances that a person lets themselves be killed rather than transgress. Tosfos answers that we only count transgressions that are from the Torah. But Rabbi Epstein says that the phrase “is that it is better” indicates that this is not obligatory. Rather this is proper thing to do beyond the letter of the law. But if one does not conduct oneself in such a manner that person is not considered a Rasha, and, thus, is not transgressing.
