It states (45:1) הנצבים לכל להתאפק יוסף יכל ולא עליו, "Yosef couldn't restrain himself in the presence of all who stood before him..." The Sfas Emes notes that it seems that Yosef wanted to conceal his identity from his brothers a little longer, but he simply couldn’t contain himself anymore. But if he could contain himself a drop longer, he would do so. It would be better for the future of Klal Yisrael, and there wouldn't be a churban Beis HaMikdash.
After revealing himself, Yosef cried on Binyamin's shoulders for the two Batei Mikdash that would be built on Binyamin's portion and would be destroyed, and Binyamin cried on Yosef's shoulder for Mishkan Shilo that would be built on Yosef's portion and would be destroyed (see Rashi 45:14). Yosef and Binyamin met after years of separation. We would expect a more joyous get-together. Why was it that the first thing they did was cry?
But this is because the root of the churban happened just then. Yosef revealed his identity to his brothers early, and if it weren't for this, the churbanos wouldn't have occurred. The root of the churbanos just occurred, and therefore, they cried at this time.
This is a reminder that every difficulty has a purpose. Every tzaar and hardship saves us from much greater troubles. The brothers were in tzaar as they stood before Yosef, and Yosef claimed that he would imprison Binyamin. This tzaar saved Klal Yisrael from a lot of tzaros. If Yosef could conceal himself a drop longer, it would have been so good for them and Klal Yisrael.
This reminds us that every tzaar has a purpose, and even if presently we don't understand how and why it is good, one day we will look back and understand.
Yaakov began his trip to Mitzrayim. It states (46:1) ויזבח שבע בארה ויבא לו אשר וכל ישראל ויסע יצחק אביו לאלקי זבחים, "Yisrael set out with all that he had, and he came to Beer-Sheva where he sacrificed korbanos to the G-d of his father, Yitzchak." Rashi and the Ramban address why specifically Yitzchak is mentioned in this pasuk. The pasuk could have stated, "He sacrificed korbanos to the G-d of his fathers," and both Avraham and Yitzchak would be included.
The Be'er Mayim Chaim writes, "It is known that Yitzchak represents the attribute of din, of strict justice. It was time to praise Hashem for the din he exercised because it was all for the good. Hakadosh Baruch Hu did only good for him."
Yaakov suffered immensely when he lost Yosef, but now he realized that it was all in his favor so he could be supported during the hunger years. Chazal say, that if it weren't for Yosef, Yaakov would be brought down to Mitzrayim in chains, like a slave. Yosef’s stay in Mitzrayim enabled Yaakov to come to Mitzrayim in honor. Therefore, Yaakov praised Hashem, יצחק אביו לאלקי, the G-d of Yitzchak. He realized that the din and hardships were also for his good.
The Be'er Mayim Chaim writes that this is also the meaning of the pasuk (Tehillim 118:21) לישועה לי ותהי עניתני כי אודך, "I thank You for You have afflicted me and became my salvation." He thanked Hashem for the afflictions because from them came his salvation.
The Be'er Mayim Chaim writes that there are different types of yesurim. One form of yesurim is to increase reward in Olam HaBa. "It is certain that all yesurim in this world are very worthwhile when it results in a moment of experiencing the rays of the Shechinah in Olam Haba."
Another form of yesurim is to remove aveiros so that he won't need the punishments of Gehinom. "One moment in gehinom is certainly worse than all yesurim in this world... One thousand yesurim in this world is better than the punishment of gehinom."
Another benefit to yesurim is that they remind a person to do teshuvah. "Sometimes, Hashem decrees to give goodness to a person, and the goodness comes down first in a negative form. The person thinks it is bad for him, but as time passes, he will see that it was a great favor for him. This happens sometimes..."
This is what happened to Yaakov and Yosef. It appeared that it was for the bad, but they eventually saw how it was all for their good.
The Ramban had a young student who was niftar young. The Ramban wrote a kameia, put it in his student's hand, and had him buried with it. The Ramban said, "When you go up to heaven, find the chamber called למשפט כסאות, Thrones of Justice. In that chamber, ask why you had to die so young, and also ask why the Jewish nation in this generation suffers so many tzaros."
Sometime later, the Ramban was learning Torah near the window. The window opened, and he saw his student as though he were alive. The student said, "With your kameia in my hand, I went from chamber to chamber, and none of the malachim stopped me. I reached the chamber called למשפט כסאות. But I didn’t ask the questions you told me to ask because Hashem's kindness is evident in that chamber. Even matters that seem bad here are all solely for the good. So I had nothing to ask..."
When the brothers, the ה"י שבטי, were in Mitzrayim, they couldn’t understand why the ruler of Mitzrayim picked on them. He accused them of espionage, theft, etc. But when Yosef said יוסף אני, "I am Yosef," all their questions vanished. Suddenly, everything made sense. The Chofetz Chaim zt'l added that many things are happening in the world that don’t seem to make sense, but when Hashem will announce, 'ה אני, "I am Hashem...", all questions will be answered.
Rebbe Moshe of Korbin zt'l said, המעשים כל על אדון ל"א, that 'Hashem is the leader of the world,' is the answer to all questions.
Reb Shmuel Rozovsky zt'l was one of the roshei yeshiva of Yeshivas Ponevizh. His father, Reb Michal Dovid zt'l was the Rav of Grodna. When Reb Michal Dovid was niftar (year ה"תרצ) he left two sons: Reb Shmuel and Reb Yehoshua Heshel. Both were fitting to be their father's successors, as Rav of Grodna.
A debate broke out between the Rozovsky family and the residents of Grodna regarding which son should take over their father. The Rozovsky family wanted Reb Yehoshua Heshel for rav since he was the older brother. The people of Grodna, however, wanted Reb Shmuel because he was a greater talmid chacham, and they considered him more fitting for the position. They decided to ask Reb Chaim Ozer zt'l.
The appointment with Reb Chaim Ozer was scheduled for ten in the morning. Reb Shmuel Rozovsky arrived at eight a.m. and told Reb Chaim Ozer, "There is nothing to discuss. I've decided not to be the rav since I have an older brother."
Two hours later, the delegation arrived at Reb Chaim Ozer's home. They discussed the issue, and Reb Chaim Ozer ruled in favor of Reb Yehoshua Heshel.
A year passed, and the city was still not at peace with their choice. Reb Shmuel realized that as long as he lived in Grodna, his personality would cast a shadow over his older brother. Although his older brother was fitting for the position, the city wouldn’t fully accept him as long as Reb Shmuel lived there.
Reb Shmuel made a gorel HaGra (using a Chumash, to know what to do and where he should go). The gorel fell on the pasuk (Bereishis 12:1) אראך אשר הארץ אל אביך ומבית ומולדתך מארצך לך לך אברם אל 'ה ויאמר, "Hashem said to Avram, leave your land, your birthplace, your father's home, to go to the land that I will show you." Reb Shmuel understood that this was telling him to move to Eretz Yisrael.
He came to Eretz Yisrael without family, but he felt that I was a worthwhile sacrifice for his brother's sake. Some years later, the war broke out. The resha'im killed the entire city of Grodna al kiddush Hashem, including Reb Yehoshua Heshel. Reb Shmuel Rozovsky was the sole survivor of his entire family.
This story teaches us (a) you never lose from being mevater. Reb Shmuel was mevater being the rav, and that saved his life. (b) Even when things seem bad, it's all good. In Grodna, Reb Shmuel was appreciated and sought after; in Eretz Yisrael, he was a stranger. But that move and those hardships saved his life. All the Torah that he taught and continues to teach through his sefarim and students is the product of those initial difficult years in Eretz Yisrael.
A somewhat similar story happened to Reb Binyamin Zev Deitsch, the principal (מנהל) of Yeshivas Ponevizh. As a bachur, he lived in Hungary, and he and another forty-nine bachurim were summoned to sign up for the Hungarian army. Their parents put together a large sum of money to bribe a doctor to "find" illnesses in the fifty bachurim so they wouldn’t be conscripted into the army. Reb Binyamin Zev's parents and the parents of one other bachur contributed the lions-share of the funds because they were wealthy and could afford it.
