Judge Favorably
When Yosef revealed himself to his brothers, they couldn’t say anything. The Torah writes (45:3), אותו לענות אחיו יכלו ולא, "'His brothers could not answer him..." The pasuk says that the reason they couldn’t answer Yosef is מפניו נבהלו כי. The translation of these words might be that they were afraid. They were worried that Yosef might harm them. Rashi however writes that מפניו נבהלו כי means הבושה מפני, they were embarrassed.
The Maharal (Gur Aryeh) explains נבהלו כי מפניו means they were embarrassed by Yosef's face. They saw a new face, a new Yosef. For the first time, they saw Yosef as he indeed was – a loving brother. A brother who doesn’t want to harm them. They realized that they had judged Yosef wrongly all along. They thought Yosef was against them, and that is the reason they sold him. They discovered that Yosef was loyal to them, and his love for his family was always there.
It states (45:4) אותי מכרתם אשר אחיכם יוסף אני מצרימה, "I am your brother Yosef, whom you sold into Mitzrayim." The Or HaChaim explains that Yosef was telling them, "I considered you my brothers, even when you sold me to Mitzrayim." This is a very high level. Even when he was being sold, his love and loyalty to his brothers continued.
The Midrash (Tanchuma 5) tells, "Yosef placed himself in a great danger when he was alone with his brothers to reveal to them that he was their brother. If his brothers would kill him, no one would know. So why did Yosef say מעלי איש כל הוציאו, that no one should be in the room when he reveals himself to his brothers? Yosef thought to himself, 'I prefer that they kill me rather than embarrassing them in front of the Egyptians." We see from this Midrash the extent of Yosef's love for his brothers despite everything they did to him. He preferred to die than to cause them embarrassment.
The Midrash tells at length the great danger Yosef was in then. They wanted to kill him, and a malach came and sent the brothers to the four corners of the house. Yet, Yosef risked his life for his brother's sake. Now they saw Yosef as he truly was, a caring, devoted brother, and they were embarrassed to face him.
