One Who Isn’t Nis'pael from Those Who Are “Greater” Comes Out Ahead
Look how Yosef, whom Chazal call קָטָן שֶׁבִשְׁבָטִים the smallest of the Shevotim, orders around his brothers, and tells them to tell his father: רְ דָה אֵלַי אַל תַּעֲמֹד “Come now; don’t waste any time!” His brothers are super powerful spiritually (all Gedolei Yisroel) and physically (they could have destroyed Mitzrayim with ease), and he acts like their boss and mentor. And later he tells them: אַל תִּרְ גְזוּ בַדָרֶךְ “Don’t lose your cool on the road”; all kinds of advice and orders. Yosef hasn’t changed in the least. From his youth, he insisted to tell them his seemingly arrogant dreams, with everyone bowing down to him, including his own parents!
The Gemara tells a story about two Jewish captives who acted like princes over their master with their tremendous Chochma. Their captor, who was a Goy, was so impressed with them, that he brought them to his house, he made them a big Seuda, and danced before them. Then he kissed them on their heads, and he praised Hashem for choosing the children of Avraham Avinu, who wherever they go, they become: שָרִ ים לַאֲדוֹנֵיהֶם the princes over their masters.
He set them free and sent them home in peace. Avraham Avinu started off his life with terrible persecutions, from Nimrod and his own father, who gave him over to Nimrod to be burned. He was called “Avraham Ha’Ivri”, since he was “over” the “other side”, i.e., against the entire world. In the end, he became: נְשִ יא אֱלֹקִ ים אַתָּה בְתוֹכֵנוּ a prince, and they would do anything for him, as they said: בְמִבְחַר קְבָרֵינוּ קְבֹר אֶת מֵתֶךָ “Take only the best”.
Avraham Avinu had no Hispa'alus from people. His name was: אַב רָ ם an “exalted father” and: שָ רָ ה Sara means: שְ רָ רָ ה rulership. This was Yosef HaTzaddik, who wasn’t Nis'pael from the entire Mishpacha despite its greatness. He was always smarter than everyone, and he came out ahead. Chazal say that so much Chochma, Bina, De'ah and Sechel were given to Klal Yisroel to be used to acquire Bitachon. Nothing changes Yosef, and even as a slave in the house of Potiphar, he says: אֵינֶנוּ גָדוֹל בַבַיִת הַזֶה מִמֶנִי “There is nobody greater than me”.
Realize Your Own Unique Maalos and Build Yourself Up
The Chovos Halvavos says that Middas Hish'tavus, i.e., where you don’t care if people love you or hate you, is Tachlis HaChamudos, the most desirable Midda. Perhaps this is why Yosef wasn’t Nichshal in: לֹא תַחְמֹד אֵשֶׁת רֵעֶךָ desiring another person’s wife (the wife of Potiphar), since he had the truest of desires, Middas Hish'tavus. No matter how low you may feel like a “captive” in a world of tremendous pressure to make impressions on others, you can remember Yosef and Avraham Avinu, and realize our own unique Maalos and build yourself up.
If you are an: עַ קְ שָׁ ן (stubborn person), then the day will come that you can be in a sense a: שַ ר לַאֲדוֹנָ יו princes over your master, since everyone has qualities that even the greatest Gedolim don’t have. We are a: מַמְלֶכֶת כֹהֲנִים nation of princes. (Rashi). The Yetzer Hara makes you spend a lifetime delving on all those areas that you are inferior to others, and there goes all that lost potential.
There was a 10th grade Rebbe in Lakewood who observed that each Bachur in the end turns out the way he sees himself. If you think you’re a Gadol, and keep being an: עַ קְ שָׁ ן (stubborn) about constantly seeing your Maalos (even if it’s is your struggles and weakness that others don’t have, and you see yourself as a Baal Ma'ala for this very reason), you will grow much more and acquire more and more Kochos, with Hashem’s help.
Especially if you have the Chochma of learning lots of Inyanei Bitachon like Yosef, you’ll grow L'maala Min HaTevah. Look at the persistent chutzpa that Yosef had! He ended up being the Yesod of Klal Yisroel, who paved the way for Middas HaYesod and Kedusha through his purity in Mitzrayim.
