Dear Alumni Sheyichyu!
Sholom U’Brocho!
Mazel Tov to Avremel Zaltzman on the occasion of his engagement. May he use out the special period of Yokor Mikol yokor to its’ utmost! Mazel Tov to Rabbi and Mrs. Abba Rubin on the birth of their daughter. Mazel Tov to Rabbi and Mrs. Meir Shlomo Posner on the birth of their son. May they bring them up lTOveCHuMAA”T mitoch harchovo, and to be true chayolim/os! (If anyone is aware of any mazeltov’s that I am missing please let me know).
Thank you very much, as always, for the feedback, it is much appreciated!
The Story of R’ Chiya bar Aba and Rabi Yochanan
The following story is recounted in the gemoro in Brochos (5B):
R’ Chiya bar Aba became ill. Rabi Yochanan came to visit him. During the visit, he asked him “Are you enjoying your suffering?” To which Rabi Chiya replied “I would be happy to forego both them and the reward that they would bring me”. “In that case”, Rabi Yochanan said to him, “give me your hand”. And Rabi Yochanan took Rabi Chiya bar Aba’s hand, and cured him.
Afterwards, Rabi Yochanan became ill, and Rabi Chanina came to visit him. During the visit, Rabi Chanina asked Rabi Yochanan “Are you enjoying your suffering?” To which Rabi Yochanan replied “I would be happy to forego both them and the reward that they would bring me”. “In that case”, Rabi Chanina said to him, “give me your hand”. And Rabi Chanina took Rabi Yochanan’s hand, and cured him.
[And the gemoro asks: If Rabi Yochanan was able to cure Rabi Chiya bar Aba, why couldn’t he cure himself (without the help of Rabi Chanina)? And the gemoro explains that the prisoner is powerless to free himself from his own confinement].
The Story of Rabi Elazar and Rabi Yochanan
Subsequently, Rabi Elazar became ill (I don’t know if people were taking their vaccination that year...), and Rabi Yochanan came to visit him. When he arrived, he saw that the dwelling in which Rabi Elazar was residing was dark (due to his poverty). So Rabi Yochanan rolled up his sleeves, and the beauty of his skin illuminated the entire room (because Rabi Yochanan possessed unnatural beauty, that was able to light up the darkness).
In the light, Rabi Yochanan noticed that Rabi Elazar was crying. “Why are you crying”, Rabi Yochanan questioned. “If the reason is because you did not manage to learn as much Torah as you wished, that does not warrant your tears, because we know that אחד המרבה ואחד הממעיט ובלבד שיכוון את לבו לשמים (to Hashem it is equally precious one who accomplishes less but does it for the sake of Heaven). And if the reason is because you don’t earn a proper livelihood and you never were wealthy, that also doesn’t justify your crying. You, after all, are immersed in learning Torah, and not everyone can expect to have “two tables” (both Torah learning and wealth, so the fact that you are able to learn Torah should justify your being deprived of wealth).
“And perhaps”, Rabi Yochanan reasoned further, “you are crying because you did not merit to have children. But that is still not grounds to cry. Look at me, I suffered worse”. (Rabi Yochanan had had ten sons, and they all passed away in his lifetime). And Rabi Yochanan removed from his pocket the bone of his tenth deceased son (which he would carry around with him), saying to Rabi Elazar “see, here are the bones of my tenth son. None survived”.
So Rabi Elazar clarified: “I was crying for none of those reasons. I was crying, rather, upon noticing your extraordinary beauty (that is capable of lighting up a dark room), and realizing that it is destined, in the end, to be swallowed up by the earth!” So, Rabi Yochanan said to him: “That, indeed, is cause to cry.” And they both cried together.
After a while, Rabi Yochanan asked him “Are you enjoying your suffering?” To which Rabi Elazar replied “I would be happy to forego both them and the reward that they would bring me”. “In that case”, Rabi Yochanan said to him, “give me your hand”. And Rabi Yochanan took Rabi Elazar’s hand, and cured him.
Reflections on Suffering and Perspective
Which sounds very puzzling! Let’s think about this: To cry about not having managed to learn more, which is something that every Jew is supposed to yearn for and strive for, is not justifiable, because – ultimately – the Eibishter accepts the “mamit”, the one who does less, equally. The fact that אחד הממעיט surely doesn’t change the fact that there is an advantage to learning more – as there is in doing more of any good thing. But, still, he is not justified to feel bad about missing out on that.
To cry about his poverty is also not acceptable, because many people don’t merit to enjoy both wealth and Torah, so he doesn’t have the right to wish for both! I think it is self-understood that Rabi Elazar wouldn’t have wanted wealth to be able to take a cruise in Cancun and go scuba diving in Eilat ch”v. He would have wanted money to be able to serve Hashem better, whether in communal affairs or in providing adequately for his family. And yet his lacking it should not bother him because he has Torah. Remember – the Torah he had was already determined to (possibly) be merely הממעיט, something to be satisfied with, and yet that should suffice to compensate him for his lack of material possessions, since other people have to also make do with “just one table”!
And even if he was saddened by not having children, which meant he was unable to fulfill the first mitzvah of the Torah, and all of the hardship that accompanies the absence of this blessing, it was still indefensible. We can’t say that it’s not the norm for one to have children, or that it’s not a reasonable expectation. On the contrary, Chazal tell us (on the Possuk ואם אין מתה אנכי) that lack of children is compared to death. And yet – it’s still not something he...
