When Yosef revealed himself to his brothers, they were stunned beyond words. But why? Did they not at one time justify their behavior to themselves? Did they really imagine that they would never get caught? How were they able to live with their actions till now and why was that justification not enough of an excuse to use at that moment?
The Dubno Maggid explains by way of a parable:
Moshe was in debt to the king for years of back taxes. Given a strict deadline to comply with, he borrowed cash and cash equivalents from friends and relatives. Reviewing the cash and notes with his son before the audit, they found that some of the cash was counterfeit and the notes were either expired or not yet convertible. Unable to secure more aid at this point, Moshe tried reassuring his son, “Don’t worry, mixed among all the other financial papers, nothing will be detected.” His son was not convinced. But the father was a bit put off by his son’s reaction.
“Don’t I have enough problems? Please have confidence in me, this will pass...” he said with irritation.
The next day before the king, Moshe gasped as the king's men picked out the expired documents and the counterfeit bills, one by one.
“Do you know the penalty for paying the king with a false note? they asked Moshe. It's death by the king’s hangman..”
Thoughts stormed through Moshe's mind. Why was I not prepared? What happened to me? Just last night I was able to answer my son with confidence and determination?
The Maggid explains: We all go through life with a false sense of security. "Our actions? No problem. When the time comes, when we have to, we'll explain everything. We've done so many mitzvos, so many good things. Don't worry," we assure ourselves, “everything will be okay."
That's not so, the Maggid explains. We must review our lives daily. There is no better time than the present for us to correct our actions. We must not overlook things, for we will fool no one but ourselves. We cannot hide behind flimsy excuses and denial, for they will surely lead us down a path of shame. No one is perfect. But we must accept our imperfections and improve now. Little steps are acceptable, in fact preferable.
Now is the time to change. Every time is a good time to change. Lev yodaiya maras nafsho – everyone knows instinctively what they have to improve. Our behavior at home, our half-hearted mitzvos, and more. Let’s put our right feet forward again and get to work. Fooling ourselves is not a plan that will succeed. Fueled by the fires of the Chanukah lights not too long ago, we must set out to fix while the light still burns... inside of us.
Written by R’ Avrohom Hillel Reich based on a lesson and story by Harav Ben Tziyon Sneh Shlita
