Marrying Off and Supporting Children
Chukai Chaim | March 22, 2024
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Marrying Off and Supporting Children

Chukai Chaim | June 27, 2025

Marrying Off Children

34. If one committed a certain sum to his mechutan to marry off a child, he may not pay from maaser money since it became a chiyuv, and a chiyuv cannot be paid with maaser. If, when he committed, he had in mind to pay with maaser money, he may. It is preferable not to use more than half of his maaser for this (חת"ס יו"ד סי' רל"א הובא בפתח"ת יו"ד סי' רמ"ט סק"ב ).

35. Similarly, if one had in mind to pay the dowry for a chosson from maaser money, he may (שו"ת מהרש"ם ח"א סי' ל"ב ).

Children Before Marriageable Age

36. One may not save his maaser money in a bank account for his children’s future weddings, since in the meantime, the money belongs to the current poor (הגרשז"א, הגריש"א באורח צדקה פי"א אות פ"א ). One may deposit the money in a gemach that will lend it to the poor in the meantime and take it back to marry off his child when the time comes (הגר"נ קרליץ ). He may do this with up to half of his maaser (שו"ת שבט הלוי ח"ט סי' ר"א אות ב').

Supporting Children

37. Married children. One may support his married sons or sons-in-law with maaser money (שו"ת שב ט הלוי ח"ה סי' קל"ג, שו"ת ח לקת יעקב יו"ד קל"ז ), even if they are not learning, if they are not succeeding in their efforts to make a livelihood; how much more so is this true for sons or sons-in-law learning in kollel with a meager stipend. Supporting them with maaser is a worthy endeavor.

Marrying Off Children

34. If one committed a certain sum to his mechutan to marry off a child, he may not pay from maaser money since it became a chiyuv, and a chiyuv cannot be paid with maaser. If, when he committed, he had in mind to pay with maaser money, he may. It is preferable not to use more than half of his maaser for this (חת"ס יו"ד סי' רל"א הובא בפתח"ת יו"ד סי' רמ"ט סק"ב ).

35. Similarly, if one had in mind to pay the dowry for a chosson from maaser money, he may (שו"ת מהרש"ם ח"א סי' ל"ב ).

Children Before Marriageable Age

36. One may not save his maaser money in a bank account for his children’s future weddings, since in the meantime, the money belongs to the current poor (הגרשז"א, הגריש"א באורח צדקה פי"א אות פ"א ). One may deposit the money in a gemach that will lend it to the poor in the meantime and take it back to marry off his child when the time comes (הגר"נ קרליץ ). He may do this with up to half of his maaser (שו"ת שבט הלוי ח"ט סי' ר"א אות ב').

Supporting Children

37. Married children. One may support his married sons or sons-in-law with maaser money (שו"ת שב ט הלוי ח"ה סי' קל"ג, שו"ת ח לקת יעקב יו"ד קל"ז ), even if they are not learning, if they are not succeeding in their efforts to make a livelihood; how much more so is this true for sons or sons-in-law learning in kollel with a meager stipend. Supporting them with maaser is a worthy endeavor.

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