Mordechai didn’t mind being hated by Klal Yisroel and even in the end, some members of the Sanhedrin distanced themselves from him. And screaming publicly ריִﬠָה ˂וֹתְבּ א ד in the middle of the city! And Esther never asked for any perfume, and preferred looking ugly. She also made a party with Achashveirosh and Haman, so the Yidden would hate her and have Bitachon in Hashem instead of saying “we have a sister in the palace”.
When you aren’t afraid of embarrassment, you are Malchus! How important it is to remember: יֵנְבּ לֵאָרְשִׂי לָכּ םֵה םיִכָלְמ א איק תבש every Yid is a PRINCE. It’s all up to the individual; you can aspire to emulate Mordechai and Esther and try to be “higher”, or you can celebrate Purim without much of a Kesher with these giants that Hashem wants us to copy.
How important it is to give yourself a shtempel: I’m a Ben-Melech and therefore I have Bitachon, and I’m not scared, embarrassed, or worried; I’m “above”. Don’t think R’ Avigdor Miller Zatzal wasn’t a human with another side to him. His greatness was that he refused to put himself down, and he was full of positive [even lies].
Being “above” includes being above your sins, and Chazal say: Fortunate is a person who is “higher” than his sins, and his sins are not higher than him. If Mordechai would have been “all-day involved” in his “down-side”, the world would have nothing from him, Chas V'shalom. The worst part of a sin is the stigma you give yourself as a result of your sin.
True, Dovid said: דיִמָת יִדְּגֶנ יִתאָטַּחְו ה אנ םילהת my sin is always before me, but he also said: יִנָא דיִסָח יִכּ תהלים פו ב I am a Chasid [one who goes beyond the letter of the law]. If you view yourself as a big Tzaddik like Dovid did, then being conscious of your sins won’t hurt you. But most of us will only hurt ourselves when reminded of our sins. We don’t see Mordechai and Esther worrying about their sins all day.
