By Sarah Chana Radcliffe
The chronically negative child is hard to live with.... A child who - at age 10 and beyond - cries at the drop of a hat, complains about everything, is never happy - may not have an "attitude problem" but rather a genetic "loose wire" that predisposes her to depressed mood. In the latter case, she can't help the way she feels - it is happening TO her, from the inside. In fact, she badly needs YOUR help in learning how to rewire her inner world. Criticizing her behavior isn't the tool that's going to work. Compassion, skilled emotional coaching, gentle boundary setting and professional help will be much more effective.
Both your child and his or her spouse will thank you for this..... Kids learn by doing, not watching. Allow them (at the appropriate ages but certainly by 12) to cook, bake, manage an allowance, manage a bank account, go shopping, take public transportation, make appointments, babysit, do laundry, organize and clean their rooms, wash dishes and make money. By the time they leave home, they should have learned to drive a car and manage a credit card as well. You'll be sending them off into the world feeling competent and confident.
