In this week's parashah, Yaakov Avinu is traveling to his father, Yitzchak, who lived in Chevron, to the south of Eretz Yisrael. Yaakov feared that when Eisav heard he was in the vicinity, he would come and take revenge on him for receiving the brachos. This is the reason Yaakov tried to make peace with Eisav.
As the Ramban (beginning of the parashah) writes, "The south of Eretz Yisrael is near Edom, and Yaakov's father, Yitzchak, also lived in the south. Yaakov would either pass through Edom or come close to Edom, and Yaakov feared that Eisav might hear that he was nearby. So before arriving, he sent malachim to Eisav's land [to make peace with him]. The chachamim criticize Yaakov for this."
It would have been better if Yaakov didn't draw attention to himself. Many years had already passed, and Eisav's anger had subsided. Had Yaakov not sent messengers to Eisav, Eisav wouldn't have thought to come to see him. By bringing up the issue, Eisav's old grievances were reawakened.
The Midrash (Bereishis Rabba 75:3, quoted in Ramban) elaborates:
It states (Mishlei 26:17), מתעבר עבר כלב באזני מחזיק לו לא ריב על, "Like someone who grabs onto a dog's ears, so too is a person who gets involved in a fight that isn't his." We can compare it to someone who sees the leader of thieves sleeping at the side of the road. He awakens him and says, "There are bad people nearby. You better get away from here." The thief got up and slapped the man. The man shouted, "You evil man! I came to help you, and you hit me?"
The thief replied, "It's your fault. Why did you wake me up?"
Similarly, Hakadosh Baruch Hu says, "Eisav was going his own way, [he wasn't thinking of harming you]. So why did you send messengers to him?!"
As is the nature of fear, Yaakov's fears only complicated matters.
The Gemara (Brachos 60.) states:
Reb Yehudah bar Nasan walked behind Rav Hamnuna, and Rav Hamnuna heard Rav Yehudah moan from fear. Rav Hamnuna said, "You are bringing troubles onto yourself. As it states (Iyov 3:25), ויאתני פחדתי פחד כי לי יבא יגרתי ואשר, 'I was afraid, and it happened. The matter I was worried about came to me.'" Fear can cause the issue you are afraid of to happen.
The Maharal (Chidushei Agodos Bava Metzia 33) writes, "The Rishonim say: When one is afraid that he might fall, that fear itself causes him to fall. [We'll prove it.] Place a wooden plank across a river, and now walk across it. You will likely fall into the river. Now place the plank on the ground and walk over it. You won't fall off. Because when you are above a river, you are afraid of falling, and that fear causes it to happen. This is also true when one is afraid that he might become poor. Thinking about this causes it to happen.... As it states in Iyov (3:25), 'That which I was afraid of, came to me.'"
Elephant tamers tie their elephants to a post, and the elephants don't try to pull away from the post to escape, although if they tried, they would succeed. Why don't they try? The answer is that when they were young and small, they tried to break loose but failed. They don't realize that they are many times that size and can easily break loose today.
We, too, must overcome our fears. Don't be afraid of the yetzer hara, or public opinion. Do what you know you should, and you will succeed.
