Issur of לא תחנם
Free Gift
1. Since we receive many questions at this time of year, mostly from bnei Chutz l’Aretz, about the halachos of gifts to non-Jews as their end-of-year holiday celebrations approach, we will set forth some halachic principles and details that apply in practice, as well as shailos that can come up at any place and time. Those to whom this is not relevant will be zocheh to expand their knowledge of another mitzvah in the Torah.
2. לא תחנם. The Torah commands us regarding our relations with avoda zara-worshipping non-Jews, “לא תחנם” (דברים ז', ג'). Chazal derive three different halachos from the wording of the posuk: 1) Do not sell them land in Eretz Yisroel to live on; 2) Do not “give them grace” by praising their appearance or actions; 3) Do not give them free gifts (גמ' ע''ז דף כ' ע''א ). A reason for this mitzva is to distance ourselves from the non-Jews’ ways (חינוך מצוה תכ''ו ).
3. “או מכור לנכרי.” Some derive the issur of giving gifts to non-Jews from a different posuk (דברים י''ד, כ''א ): Do not eat any neveila ... sell it to a non-Jew (גמ' שם, גמ' פסחים דף כ''א ע''ב ). The Torah is particular that we sell it to a non-Jew and not give it to him for free. Some understand based on these two sources that giving a gift violates a lav and an asei (תוס' ע''ז שם ד''ה ר''י, מנ''ח מצוה תכ''ו ).
4. Based on this, the Shulchan Aruch rules (יו''ד סי' קנ''א סי''א, חו''מ סי' רמ''ט ס''ב ) one may not give a gift to a non-Jew he does not know.
To Whom Is it Assur to Give Gifts?
5. All nations. The posuk of לא תחנם refers to the Seven Nations. Thus, some hold the issurim derived from it only apply to those nations (סמ''ג לאווין מ''ח ). Similarly, some hold one only violates the lav by giving a gift to an actual avoda-zara worshipper (עי' שו''ת שבט הלוי ח''ד סי' רי''ג ).
6. However, most poskim do not differentiate and hold the issur applies to all nations, including ones that do not worship avoda zara (תוס' ע''ז כ' ע''א ד''ה אמר, תוס' יבמות דף כ''ג ע''א ד''ה ההוא, סתימת הרמב''ם פ''י ע''ז, חינוך מצוה תכ''ו, מנ''ח שם, ב''י חו''מ סי' רמ''ט, ש''ך יו''ד סי' קנ''א סקח''י ).
7. Yishmael. Some are meikel with the offspring of Yishmael who do not do avoda zara (שו''ת רשב''א ח''א סי' ח'), but from their lack of distinction, it is clear many poskim hold the issur is for all nations, including Yishmael (ב''י שם, ש''ך שם, נשמת כל חי סי' נ''ד ).
8. Ger toshav. One may give a gift to a non-Jew who accepts upon himself the seven mitzvos Bnei Noach [i.e., the three severe aveiros of avoda zara, gilui arayos, and murder, as well as בר מן א החי, רכת השםב, זלג, and יניםד] like the din of a ger toshav (ב''ח ב''י, חו''מ סי' רמ''ט, שו''ע שם ס''ב, סמ''ע שם ), as the issur of לא תחנם was not stated with respect to them. However, the average non-Jew in the street today is not defined as a ger toshav.
9. Jewish mumar [sinner]. Even if someone sins to satisfy his desires [לתאבון], we must sustain him; we certainly must do chesed to him (פתח''ת יו''ד סי' רנ''א ס''ב, אהבת חסד דיני הלואה פ''ג אות ב'). Even though we do not need to sustain one who sins out of spite [להכעיס], it is unlikely that the lav of לא תחנם applies to him, as he is not like a non-Jew for this lav. The issur of לא תחנם certainly does not apply to someone raised secular [who is likely considered an oneis for these purposes] (חזו''א או''ח סי' פ''ז סקי''ד ).
Acquaintance
10. One may give a gift to a non-Jewish acquaintance, as such a person is not subject to the issur of לא תחנם (שו''ע שם ). Giving something to an acquaintance is more like a sale than a gift as he will repay the favor or has already given benefit (ט''ז יו''ד סי' קנ''א סק''ח, לבוש ).
For One’s Own Benefit
11. Some say one may give a gift to a non-Jew if he will get some personal benefit (ט''ז שם ). As long as one personally benefits, it is viewed as a sale, not a gift, as he receives something or some value in exchange.
12. Gift to a mailman. Thus, one may give a gift to a non-Jew who delivers the mail daily so that he will continue to do his job properly.
13. Gift to a maid. Similarly, one may give a gift to a non-Jewish woman who helps with the housework, as this makes her do a more reliable job, and the giver benefits.
14. To prevent harm. One may give a gift to a non-Jew accompanying him so that he does not harm him; this is like a sale (תוס' ע''ז שם ).
15. For peaceful relations [דרכי שלום]. One may also give a gift to a non-Jew for the sake of peaceful relations (תוס' שם, שו''ע חו''מ סי' רמ''ט ס''ב ). This is also like a sale – the giver gives to prevent them from antagonizing or harming us, leading to peaceful coexistence. However, one must know that it is truly for peaceful relations, as not every gift to a non-Jew falls into this category.
Mitzva Purpose
16. Chometz erev Pesach. When erev Pesach falls on Shabbos [as it does this year, 5785/2025] and there is no other way to get rid of one’s leftover chometz, he may give it as a gift to a non-Jew. This does not violate the issur of לא תחנם since it is for Jewish benefit, namely to not violate בל יראה ובל ימצא (תוספתא פסחים ב:ו , רשב''א גיטין לח : בשם הרמב''ן, מ''ב תמ''ד סקט''ז, ודלא כחק יעקב תמ''ח , אות י''ב ).
17. Tevilas keilim. One may give a new dish as a gift to a non-Jew on Shabbos or Yom Tov and then borrow the dish from him to exempt it from tevila until after Shabbos (שו''ע או''ח סי' שכ''ג ס''ז ). This is not a problem of לא תחנם (קו' בשו''ת כת''ס או''ח סי' ס''א ) since there is a mitzva purpose for a Jew (ע''פ הרמב''ן הנ''ל ).
Paying Extra Money to a Non-Jew
18. Getting change. When buying something from a non-Jew, one should take the change from the seller after paying, as telling him to keep the change for himself is a problem of לא תחנם. If, however, it is just small change and it is inconvenient for the Jew to take it, he can leave it with the non-Jew, as he is doing so for his own benefit (אהל יעקב הל' לא תחנם אות י''ט ).
19. Tip for service. When a non-Jew services a Jew, e.g., as a waiter, hotel bellhop/porter, deliveryman, taxi driver, etc., and there is a chance he will use him again and derive benefit in the future by tipping him, then the Jew may give him extra money. Similarly, one may tip him in the middle of his job so that he improves his service (שו''ת שרגא המאיר ח''ז סי' קנ''ה ). However, if the job is done and the Jew will not benefit at all from tipping him, he should not do so, as it is a problem of לא תחנם (נשמת כל חי מהגר''ח פאלאג'י סי' נ''ה ).
20. Standard to tip. However, if the accepted practice in that place or situation is always to tip, one may give a tip. As long as one is doing it because of the local custom, it is like the service provider’s wages and is not a problem of לא תחנם (הגריש''א, אשרי האיש יו''ד פ''י אות ל''ג, מו''ר בעל שבט הקהתי ).
