An Islamic preacher got into a taxi in London and said to the taxi driver: “Brother, please turn off the radio, because as the Holy Qur'an commands, I am not allowed to listen to music, because in the time of the Prophet there was no music, especially western music, which is the music of the disbelievers.” The taxi driver politely turned off the radio, stopped the taxi and opened the door.
Zakir asked him: “What are you doing bro...” The taxi driver answered politely: “In the era of the Prophet: There were no taxis. There were no bombs. There were no shortcuts. There were no loudspeakers in the mosques to wake up new-borns, the elderly and the sick at eerie hours. There were no suicide bombings. There was no AK 47. So shut up, step outside and wait for a camel...”
Leah G just read a book about Helium. It was so good that she couldn't put it down.
Chani G wondered what her parents did to fight boredom before the internet. She asked her 17 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either.
Teacher: “If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?” Vincent: “One dollar.” Teacher: “You don’t know your arithmetic.” Vincent: “You don’t know my father.”
Chaim Yankel and his wife Rivkah were firm believers in the commandment to “be fruitful and multiply”. After only 10 years of marriage he already had 8 kids. When Chaim Yankel was forced to move because of his job he was having a very hard time finding an apartment where the landlord would be willing to rent to such a big family. Finally after being turned down one time too many Chaim Yankel had an idea. “Rivkah” said Chaim Yankel to his wife, “go with the six little kids to the cemetery while I go see this apartment.”
Later that day while checking out an apartment the landlord asked, “How many children do you have?” “I have 8 children,” Chaim Yankel truthfully replied, “but 6 of them are with their mother in the cemetery.”
