Thought of the week:
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do.
“...OEL HsE HTA RwA HZH RBDH HM RMAYW OEL HsE AWH RwA LK TA HwM ITX ARYW‰
“And Moshe’s father-in-law saw all that he was doing to the nation and said, “What is this thing that you are doing to the nation...?”” (Exodus 18:14)
The Torah tells us Yisro heard all the great things Hashem did, and came to his son-in-law, Moshe, in order to get his perspective on all of it. While at the camp of the Jewish People, Yisro took note of the goings on and was not afraid to offer advice.
One conversation took place when Yisro watched Moshe judging the Jews. Moshe sat there, alone, as the sole arbiter of Hashem’s law, while the nation stood around and waited their turn to speak with him and present their questions. Moshe explained that he was judging the people and advising them of the law. Yisro suggested that this was not a good plan as neither Moshe nor the people would last very long. He suggested appointing other judges to assist Moshe.
The commentaries offer numerous opinions as to what Yisro was questioning. Some say he feared that Moshe was being unfair to the people because of the time it would take for him to hear their cases. Others suggest Yisro feared his son-in-law was remaining the sole judge out of a feeling of arrogance, as if he could not stand to share the limelight or allow other judges to rule in his presence. Perhaps it would be more appropriate for Moshe to seat one or two other sages with him so it did not appear that he was making everyone stand for him.
Regardless of what the reasoning was, we see some very interesting insights into giving criticism or advice. The Torah doesn’t say it was “Yisro” who saw, but “Moshe’s father-in-law.” This teaches us that when you want to offer someone criticism or suggestions, you must first make sure that it is solely done for their benefit, and not because YOU want it. We often have our own ulterior motives for trying to change others, even if we are not aware of it. They must be the focus.
Further, we see that Yisro observed, “all that Moshe was doing.” He didn’t look at half the story and come to a conclusion. Instead, he made sure he saw the whole picture before he offered his own opinions.
Finally, he asked, “What is this that you’re doing?,” giving Moshe a chance to explain, and when he responded to Moshe’s explanation that the people came to him seeking Hashem, Yisro said, “this thing you are doing isn’t good,” thereby expressing concern about the behavior, but not maligning the person.
This sensitivity and understanding were what made Yisro a valuable advisor, first to Pharaoh, and later requested by Moshe to accompany Klal Yisrael and offer his insights. We can learn a lot from how he attempted to influence people. Perhaps that is why the Torah is given in the parsha named for Yisro, because one must love others and only then can he bring them closer to Torah, in a way they can accept it.
A fellow once came to Telshe Yeshiva in Cleveland, OH, and met the Rosh HaYeshiva, Rabbi Mordecai Gifter. He’d been in the Navy and got interested in his Jewish heritage. R’ Gifter asked why he was there. “I came to find God,” he replied. “If it’s G-d you’re looking for,” thundered R’ Gifter, “you won’t find Him here. Torah? Torah you can find here, but not “G-d.”” The fellow was taken aback until another rabbi softly explained, “What the Rosh HaYeshiva means is that Judaism isn’t just that you eat a kosher salami sandwich and you’ve arrived. It takes Torah study and time to get to know G-d, and what He wants from you; it isn’t something that just happens.” [The fellow ended up studying in the Yeshiva and Kollel for many years before accepting a position teaching other returnees to Judaism.]
©2024 – J. Gewirtz
