Question: I feel like when I was younger I felt closer to Hashem. I was more excited about Shabbat, davening and just felt more spiritual. I don’t feel the same closeness anymore and don’t feel I can ever be inspired in the same way as before. Do you have any suggestions.
Answer: In the 1960s many Jewish youth became inspired by Judaism. They were dissatisfied with the status quo society offered and were searching for answers. The Rebbe saw the amazing opportunity and stood on the forefront - helping Jewish youth quench their thirst in the beauty of Judaism. This was the beginnings of what many called the “kiruv movement”.
However, the Rebbe discouraged the use of the word “kiruv”. In fact, a certain Rabbi wrote to the Rebbe that he was involved with “kiruv rechokim”, bringing close those who are distant. The Rebbe responded,
You call them “distant”?! What gives you the right to say that you are close and they are far? You must approach each one of them as though you are the King’s servant sent with a message to His most precious child!
So too in our lives, we may feel distant or close—but how do we really know. As it is written: "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways," says the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts [higher] than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55:8-9) Hashem not only transcends the finite, but also transcends the infinite. Hashem is beyond anything we can possibly fathom.
As discussed in last week’s column, certain thought patterns prevent us from actualizing our true selves. A common pattern is “emotional reasoning” - wherein events, people and life are interpreted based on how one feels. “Feeling people” and often more prone to emotional reasoning. This tendency is seen in their choice of words, both speaking and writing. In your short letter you use a derivate of the word “feel” five times, in addition to other emotive language. It could be that your perception of yourself is intertwined with how you feel. Yet, although you feel distant, this does not mean you are distant.
That being said, how can we feel close to Hashem? Chassidus explains that “simcha shel mitzvah” (the joy of doing a mitzvah) reveals our intimate connection with Hashem. In fact, it is written about the AriZal, the great heights he attained was in the merit of simcha shel mitzvah.
In conclusion: 1. The fact that you do not feel close to Hashem, does not mean that you are not close. 2. Simcha shel mitzvah is a vehicle to feel G-dliness in our lives.
Aharon Schmidt, marriage & individual counseling, [email protected]
