The gemara learns from Avraham’s deal with Efron that the word קיחה (taking) refers to a money acquisition and applies this well-known derivation to the realm of Jewish marriage, with practical significance.
On the posuk, “When a man takes a wife,” Chazal refer back to the aforementioned posuk from Chayei Sarah and conclude: a marriage may be consummated using money (or an object of monetary value like a ring). The question is: how is it appropriate to determine the acquisition of marriage from a business venture between Avraham Avinu and Efron? What is the connection between marriage and the purchase of this piece of land?
The posuk tells us that Avraham Avinu needed this specific piece of land - the Mearas HaMachpela - to bury his wife, his lifelong partner, Sarah. It was so important to him that he would have paid any price to acquire it - even more than the four hundred silver shekalim that he did pay. Thus, when he bought it, he felt he got the biggest bargain of his life. Efron, too, was happy with the transaction. To him, this land was worthless, but when he saw how much it meant to Avraham, he kept raising the price, all the while thinking he fooled Avraham and earned himself quite a hefty sum. In fact, both Avraham and Efron walked away from the deal very satisfied, each one thinking he got the bargain.
How beautifully this idea can be applied to marriage. It’s not the business venture of Avraham and Efron to which Chazal symbolize marriage, but the feeling that each side got the better end of the deal. A truly successful marriage is based on the inner feeling and value of the greatness of one’s spouse. Both a chosson and a kallah must walk away from their chupa feeling that he and she got the best deal of their lives. And it is a feeling that must remain with a husband and wife all throughout their lives.
Do you know how long a chosson is a melech, a king? As long as he treats his kallah like a malka, a queen.
