The pasuk in Parshas Chukas says, “Hashem said to Moshe and Aharon at Mount Hor by the border of the land of Edom: Aharon shall be gathered to his people, for he shall not enter the land that I have given to the Children of Israel...” (Bamidbar 20:23-24). The Torah describes the ceremony of how Aharon HaKohen died on the first of Av, and how his son Elazar took over after him as the Kohen Gadol.
The pasuk then says: “When the entire assembly saw that Aharon had perished, they wept for Aharon thirty days, the entire House of Israel.” (Bamidbar 20:29).
Rashi famously points out here that when Aharon died, the pasuk says that he was mourned by “kol Beis Yisrael” – the entire house of Israel. However, when Moshe died, the Torah only mentions that he was mourned by “Beis Yisrael” – the house of Israel, but not by “kol Beis Yisrael.” Rashi explains that Aharon was mourned by both the men and the women because he was a peacemaker who brought shalom between arguing parties and between quarreling husbands and wives.
This is not to say that the women did not mourn the death of Moshe Rabbeinu, but they were particularly saddened by the death of Aharon HaKohen, who was known as an ohev shalom v’rodef shalom, who patched up many troubled marriages. In short, there was a greater outpouring of grief for the loss of Aharon than there was for the loss of Moshe.
Avos D’Rav Nosson (12:3) describes Aharon HaKohen. The Mishna says (both in Avos and in Avos D’Rav Nosson) that Aharon was a lover of peace and a pursuer of peace. Avos D’Rav Nosson says that the pasuk “The teaching of truth was in his mouth, and injustice was not found on his lips; he walked with Me in peace and with fairness and turned many away from iniquity” (Malachi 2:6) is referring to Aharon. Avos D’Rav Nosson then describes Aharon’s peace-making technique: When Aharon would be walking along the road and meet a wicked person, he would give that person a very friendly greeting. The next day, when that person was tempted to do an aveira, the person would stop in his path and say “Woe is me! How can I do such a thing and ever be able to look at Aharon HaKohen straight in the eyes again? I am too embarrassed to disappoint him like that because he treated me as such a friend!” So the person ceased and desisted from doing any further aveiros.
I saw an observation brought down in the name of Rav Avrohom Yitzchok Bloch (Rosh Yeshiva of the Telshe Yeshiva in Europe at the time of its destruction in 1944). As we all know, there are people who, whenever they meet you, they greet you with a big smile and say, “How are you? It is so great to see you. How are things going?” But when the person walks away from you, you feel that the greeting was really just lip service. He didn’t really mean it.
Why didn’t people have that attitude with Aharon HaKohen? Why didn’t people say “He was just putting on an act. He doesn’t really care about me!”? In fact, how was it that Aharon, who was a tzadik, was able to mean it when he greeted all those reshaim with such a warm and friendly disposition?
The answer is that if we reexamine that pasuk in Malachi which describes Aharon HaKohen, we notice that Aharon was not only a lover of peace and a pursuer of peace. The pasuk also notes that “The Torah of truth was in his mouth and iniquity did not pass his lips.” These two phrases: 1) Toras emes ha yesa b’feehu (i.e. – he never uttered a falsehood) and 2) avla lo nimtza b’sfasav (i.e. – when he had to give a person mussar, he apparently gave him mussar, but it was never in an angry or annoyed way). Aharon did not give mussar (chastise) with venom or a put-down or scorn.
This is a very difficult needle to thread. On the one hand, Toras emes ha yesa b’feehu – when Aharon saw you doing something wrong, he was not going to pull his punches. He spoke words of truth. But yet, avla lo nimtza b’sfasav – he never said a cross word! So, when he gave someone this warm “Shalom aleichem! How are you? It is so good to see you!” people believed his sincerity. He had the reputation of being impeccably honest. His warm greeting and his Shalom aleichem were not fake emotions. As much as he was known for being an ohev shalom v’rodef shalom, he was equally known for speaking only truth and Toras emes. He never faked it or put on an act.
Therefore, someone who met Aharon and was greeted so warmly by him would not turn around and do an aveira tomorrow – simply because he would be too embarrassed to meet Aharon again. That was a very hard tightrope to walk, but Aharon HaKohen was successful in doing it.
