We wonder what kind of love did Avraham Avinu experience in his life, with a father like Terach, who gave him over to king Nimrod to be burned alive for smashing his father’s idols. (Rashi). Of course, we have no understanding of these people. But for us, it can be a great Mussar Haskel (lesson).
Avraham becomes the epitome of giving love to others, despite his difficult background. I’m a 4th grade Rebbe, who periodically tries to build up my Talmidim. For example, Chaim may need a special boost, so (step one) I ask Shlomy if he likes Chaim. Shlomy says “yes”, and Chaim feels good. But then (step two) I ask Chaim if he likes Shlomy. When he says “yes”, I feel that step two was far more effective for Chaim than step one.
The best boost you can give yourself is caring for others. You are a giver (vs. a taker), and you are automatically on top and not on bottom. You don’t need any therapists, or writing your Maalos all day. Again and again, I’m told that Yungerleit in out-of-town Kollelim are by far the happiest. They are “givers”, and feel needed and respected.
When Yungerleit ask me which shul or Bais Medrash or Chabura they should join, I always tell them to go to the place where you get more Kavod! Then you will thrive, and be able to do more for Klal Yisroel.
Guess where I got this Hashkafa from? Novardok! (R' Chaim Mordechai Wainkrantz Zatzal). A smart Novardoker realizes that you don’t just start working on Bizyonos. You need the proper: הָכָרְדַה guidance for that! Don’t look for trouble, unless you know what you’re doing, and only if you have a Rebbe and: מוֹ ֶר ֶד ה ֶר˂ guide.
A True Baal Chesed Is Someone Who Is So Full, That He Wants to Share His Overflowing Goodness with Others
Avraham had two names; ָרְבַא ָה ם Avraham and: יִרְבִﬠָה HaIvri. The reason why he was an Ivri (capable of going against the entire world. Chazal), was because he was: םָר elevated and higher than the pettiness of Olam HaZeh. He was not just higher by being superior; he was there to “give” and to be an: ָא ב father to the whole world, and help everyone with his greatness.
A simple Baal Chesed can be in Sakana (danger) and stoop to the level of his recipients. The true Baal Chesed is high way above, and remains always on a much higher level; and he operates from there. The Netziv brings many proofs that Avraham Avinu was ַﬠמוּ ַה ד תּוֹ ָר ה the pillar of Torah. How do we reconcile his being considered Chesed everywhere?
Because the true Ben-Torah is a person who is so full with overflowing Middos Tovos and his love for Torah, that he wants to share it with everyone else, so his love for Hashem is shared with everyone. A Baal Chesed םָרְבַא אָריִתּ לַא דֹאְמ הֵבְּרַה ˃ְרָכְשׂ א וט
A Main Yetzer Hara of Our Generation Is Depression About Our Spiritual Level
Some say that Avraham Avinu was afraid because he killed so many people, or because he had to do with Melech Sedom, etc. Just as Hashem had to reassure Avraham Avinu not to worry since his Schar is very great, so many of us need to be M'chazek ourselves, and say: אָריִתּ לַא,לֶקְנַי דֹאְמ הֵבְּרַה ˃ְרָכְשׂ Don’t worry “Yankel”, your Schar is very great! One of the main Yetzer Hara’s of our generation is Atzvus (sadness) about our spiritual status.
We all have tons and tons of Mitzvos and Zechusim, but the Yetzer Hara makes us worry all day about our Aveiros. And sometimes this is actually a Ma'ala, since we want to improve. We can suggest that: םָרְבַא אָריִתּ לַא דֹאְמ הֵבְּרַה ˃ְרָכְשׂ means that since you have so much pain and worry about your sins, this in itself will give you much Schar, since you are a big Baal Yissurim with all this worry.
who is empty and just gives others is fine, but not ideal like Avraham Avinu.
The True Ben-Torah Wants to Share His Torah with Others
The Netziv says that Avraham Avinu’s specialty was mainly in learning Torah (and he has loads of Chazal’s proving it. He says that Yitzchok was Tefila, and Yaakov was Chesed!) So why do we find Avraham Avinu being the Baal Chesed wherever you turn? First of all, they say that his main Chesed was in Ruchaniyus, as it says: ןָרָחְב וּשָׂﬠ רֶשֲׁא שֶׁפֶנַּה תֶאְו יב ה the people he “created” in Charan by teaching them to have Emuna in Hashem; i.e., the true Ben-Torah wants others to share in his Torah (see Gr”a).
Practically no Shevet is known for Torah as much as Shevet Yehuda (Gemara), and we find: חַלָשׁ הָדוּהְי תֶאְו הָנְשׁגּ ויָנָפְל תֹרוֹהְל ויגש מו כח Yaakov Avinu sent Yehuda, the #1 Ben-Torah, to build a Yeshiva in Goshen.
A true Ben-Torah is in general involved in caring for Klal Yisroel. During WWII, R’ Ahron Kotler and R' Avrohom Kalmanovich were seen on Shabbos being Moser Nefesh to save the Yidden in Europe. They gave away their time and Kochos and their Oneg Shabbos for the Klal. Perhaps this is why by far the two most astronomical Yeshivos in the world are Lakewood and Mir.
