There was once a heartbroken fellow who, after losing a close family member and experiencing other challenges, approached R’ Shlomka of Zeville with the following question:
Chazal say that upon losing a family member, one must make the brachah of Dayan Ha’emes, and that the brachah should be made with the same joy as one would have when making a brachah on good tidings, Ha’tov V’Ha’meitiv. But why is it that only someone confronted with challenges makes that brachah? Shouldn’t there also be a brachah for someone who doesn’t have any problems? That’s also worthy of a brachah! Why is there only a brachah for one faced with extreme difficulty?
R’ Shlomo answered him with a powerful analogy:
When one comes collecting for a certain cause, and the donor asks him for two-dollars change before giving him the donation, what enters the collector’s mind at that moment? That the donor is giving him a five-dollar bill. If he asks for five-dollars change, the collector expects he’s getting a ten-dollar bill. If it would be thirty-dollars change, he’d expect a fifty-dollar donation, etc. In short, the more the change, the greater the donation.
“In the same vein,” continued R’ Shlomke, “Hashem follows suit. The more ‘change’ we have to give Hashem, i.e., the more we have to endure, the greater the ‘donation’ we can expect Hashem will give us. Thus, when one has to ‘give Hashem’ more, the more he can anticipate receiving.
“That is why one must make a brachah on the bad and not on just having tranquility and stability. Only the one who has bad has this extra good awaiting him, and that’s the cause for this brachah. The other person doesn’t have this excitement facing him, so how can he make this brachah? He doesn’t have the assurance that anything’s awaiting him, and thus he can’t make the brachah.”
When one has a big challenge, in the light of his emunah, he can see the ultimate salvation coming. That is surely reassuring and exciting, as it means that extreme good is waiting for him. Hence, already at the time of the difficulty, he makes a brachah.
