Must the Maseder Kiddushin Drink from the Cup of Wine Used for Birchas Erusin?
There are various different minhagim [customs] regarding what should be done with the cup of wine used for the birchas erusin under the chuppah. The original minhag always was, that the maseder kiddushin would recite hagofen, then recite the birchas erusin, and he wouldn’t drink anything from the cup of wine, and he would give it straight to the chosson and kallah to drink from.
The idea that the mesader kiddushin doesn’t need to drink from the wine, is clear from the Mishnah Berurah (end of 550) who writes that on a ta’anis (when the one making the berachah, and the chosson and kallah don’t taste from the wine) we recite hagofen and give the wine to a young child to drink. We see that there is no requirement for the mesader kiddushin to taste from the wine.
However, nowadays, many have the minhag that the mesader kiddushin does taste from the wine before giving it to the chosson and kallah to drink, or he tastes from the drops of wine that spilt on his hand.
Yotza Moitzi by Birchas Erusin
The source for this new minhag is the Pnei Yehoshua in Kuntros Achron on Kesubos, where he asks: How can the mesader kiddushin be moitzi the chosson and kallah with the berachah of hagofen, surely it is a birchas hanhenin and by birchas hanhenin we rule yotza eino moitzi, that “Yotza moitzi” is a term normally used by birchas hamitzvos, which means, that even if one has already fulfilled a mitzvah, he can repeat the mitzvah and recite a berachah on it to help someone else fulfill their duty. However, by birchas hanhenin it means, can one make for example the berachah of shehakol on a cup of water, if he doesn’t intend to drink the water himself. We refer to it as yotza moitzi even though one hasn’t actually been yoitza anything yet, as it is as if he has already carried out the chiyuv, as he has no need to do it, just like one who has already fulfilled a mitzvah.
if one doesn’t need the berachah for himself, he can’t make it for others? By kiddush and havdolah we say yotza moitzi, as by kiddush and havdolah the obligation to drink the wine is part and parcel of fulfilling the mitzvah of kiddush and havdolah, however, by birchas erusin, this is not the case. There is no Gemara which obligates one to use a cup of wine when reciting the birchas erusin, it is a minhag which the Geonim adopted due to אין אומרים שירה אלא על היין – that when saying song we say it over wine, and if one doesn’t have wine he can recite the birchas erusin without it, unlike kiddush and havdolah where having wine is me’akev [fundamental]. The Pnei Yehoshua concludes tzorich iyun [the matter needs more looking into].
Because of this question, some achronim hold that the maseder kiddushin should taste some of the wine. They bring a diyuk [implication] for this from the Rambam in Shu”t Pe’er HaDar (siman 8): “And because of this, the gedolei chachomim in our city would first make a berachah on one cup of wine, a birchas erusin, and they would taste it to ensure it wasn’t a berachah levatolah.” It is implicit from the Rambam, that the maseder kiddushin would taste from the wine.
Eidus [Testimony] About the Minhag of R’ Chaim Brisker zt”l
The Sefer Afikei Yam (Vol. 2, siman 2) quotes a letter from R’ Simcha Zelig Reiger zt”l, in which he testifies that the minhag of R’ Chaim Brisker was to purposely make sure that some of the wine spilt out of the cup of wine on to his hand, and after the berachah he would taste from this wine, in a manner that people wouldn’t notice [in order not to openly change from the minhag].
The Afikei Yam concludes: It needs to be established, that the one reciting the berachah should taste from the cup of wine, to avoid any questions of berachah levatolah, or one should at least do like R’ Chaim Brisker and taste from the wine that spills on one’s hand.
The Minhag of a Number of Great Poskim
The Shulchan HaEzer (siman 8, sif 1, he’orah 9) and the sefer HaDras Kodesh (Inyonei Nisuin, siman 5) both bring testimony that R’ Yosef Chaim Sonnenfeld zt”l would taste from the wine that spilt on his hands, and that they heard that R’ Shmuel Salant also did this. However, they add that the minhag in Yerushalayim wasn’t like this, as doing so is not considered derech eretz [well-mannered].
It is also brought down in Orchos Rabbeinu, that the Steipler had the minhag to taste from the wine at most of the weddings that he was mesader kiddushin at for his grandchildren.
The Kovetz Tzohar (Vol. 12) brings a manuscript from the Aderes, in which he testifies that he was at a chuppah with R’ Shmuel Salant and he saw that he tasted from the cup of wine used for the birchas erusin [the Shulchan HaEzer also brings this]. The Aderes writes that he thinks the reason for this was because of the Pnei Yehoshua. However, the Aderes defends the minhag ha’oilam not to for two reasons, as we will see below, and the Aderes himself followed the minhag ha’oilam.
