Our parashah deals with the very long period from the beginning of the shibud Mitzrayim until the beginning of the redemption. Among the events chronicled in the parashah is the dialogue between Moshe Rabbeinu and HaKadosh Baruch Hu at the sneh, where Hashem told him: I will go down to rescue the Jewish People from the hands of Mitzrayim.
Why did the Ribbono shel Olam use an expression of וארד, going down? Answers the Ohr HaChaim HaKadosh: “For it is not befitting for the honor of HaKadosh Baruch Hu to hold a dialogue with Pharaoh. It is beneath His honor, and thus it is considered ‘going down.’ Speaking with someone is in essence giving them recognition, and the great rashah Pharaoh doesn’t deserve recognition from the Melech Malchei HaMelachim. Thus, the dialogue that the Ribbono shel Olam had with Pharaoh—through Moshe Rabbeinu—was far beneath his honor.”
Continues to Ohr HaChaim HaKadosh: “Furthermore, their dialogue reached a stage of denial until the point that Pharoh proclaimed, ‘Who is Hashem,’ chas v’shalom. The Midrash in Eichah elaborates on the great shame that it is for a wise person to engage in dialogue with a fool. And nevertheless, the Ribbono shel Olam was prepared to denigrate Himself, kvayochol, for the redemption of the Yidden from their Egyptian tormentors.”
Lowering Ourselves to Understand Others
When HaKadosh Baruch Hu reveals to us a middah of His, a mode of His conduct, it is not by accident; He does so expressly so we will learn from it and apply it to our lives, as we are taught, בדרכיו והלכת, and you will go in His ways. And if the Ribbono shel Olam revealed to us that He lowered Himself in order to redeem Klal Yisrael, we must learn from this that when we wish to rescue our fellow who finds himself on a lower level than we are—for example a talmid, a child, or another wandering neshamah—although it is not always befitting for us to lower ourselves, nevertheless we must do so, just as Hashem did.
Greater Revelations
We will elaborate a bit more: Why did Hashem need to bring about the redemption davka in this way—by lowering Himself to dialogue with Pharaoh? He could have redeemed His children in other ways! He did it in this way so that ultimately it would bring about greater revelations of Malchus Shamayim. Because Pharaoh refused to let the Yidden go, and this brought about the miracles of the Makkos, and later the incredible revelations of Kriyas Yam Suf.
Meeting Them Where They Are
Often, lowering ourselves to help others entails lowering ourselves into their situation in order to lift them up from there. For how can we lift a person from his mistakes if we don’t understand how they wandered there in the first place? For this, it is necessary for our minds to understand the sometimes-twisted way of thinking that the person has embarked upon. Otherwise, we won’t be able to understand the person we are trying to help.
This concept is introduced to us another time in this very parashah; when Moshe Rabbeinu ran after the goat the left his flock. Moshe wanted to see what this goat was experiencing: Why did he run away? There’s an entire flock, and one goat departed. It must be that something ails him. Thus, Moshe pursued him and discovered that he was thirsty and tired. When Moshe Rabbeinu saw this, he understood that no one ever runs away for no reason.
Moshe the Shepherd
Indeed, this is the idea of להצילו וארד, to lower ourselves to rescue others. When we see a person who has ceased to enjoy ruchniyus and begins straying, R”l... we see a goat that departed the flock... and it’s painful. “What?! You’re abandoning a life of light and clarity... a life of connection to the Ribbono shel Olam... a life of revelation of Elokus... a life of eternity... a life of fulfilment in both worlds... for what? For emptiness and nothingness?! It’s very painful.
But if we fulfill the וארד, to lower ourselves, we can then fulfill the להצילו, to rescue them. It is impossible to rescue those people without lowering ourselves to them. We must lower ourselves a bit in order to listen... not for the purpose of arguing or to prove them wrong, but only for the sake of listening to them and understanding their pain.
Only after we understand the person so well that we can explain his pain to him better than he understands it himself, only then can we hope to pull him out of the rut and return him to a path of righteousness.
Really Listening
This type of listening requires going out of our mode of thinking. Usually, when two people argue, one will afford the other the courtesy of listening to him... but it’s clear that he’s dug in. It’s evident that he’s not listening with a full heart and mind. He’s impatient, as he says... “I am listening to every word... are you done yet?”
This type of listening doesn’t bring about mutual understanding, for the peshat is this: You’re dug into your own thinking, but you’re being respectful by listening to the other person and allowing him to express his opinion, because you’re confident that there’s no merit to it. Such a conversation will not change anyone’s mind.
We must truly lower ourselves down to where the other person is. The tzaddikim always spoke about the need to enter the other person’s situation and truly understand his nisayon.
Finding the Donkey
There’s a parable about a town in which a donkey went missing. Everyone went around searching for the lost donkey to no avail, until a wise man came and said, “Give me an hour and I will bring you the donkey.” Lo and behold, after an hour, the wise man returned with the donkey in tow. Everyone was excited and wanted to know how he managed to locate the donkey so quickly.
“Simple,” answered the wise man. “I imagined that I was a donkey, and I said to myself, ‘If I were a donkey, where would I go?’ And so, I followed my imagination, and wherever it carried me, that’s where I went, until I found the lost donkey!”
Changing Clothes
Similarly, the Ba’al HaTanya and other tzaddikim explained why they sweated so much when they took in Yidden for berachos and yeshu’os. “When a Yid comes in to us, we must change out of our own clothes and put on his clothes in order to help him [that is, to see things from his perspective]. And when he leaves, we must change back into our clothes [that is, after we understand his predicament, we must not remain with him in the rut, but we must return to our previous level]. This aspect—not remaining in the rut— is very important as well.
For, if one seeks to rescue a person from drowning, he must have the strength to pull him out of the water along with himself—otherwise he will be pulled down into the depths along with him.
Said the tzaddikim: After changing clothes so many times, it is understandable why they sweat so much from exertion.
Where’s the Donkey Heading?
To our point, when a person doesn’t understand the art of truly listening, he is likely to say things like: “What are you doing? Where are you headed? Don’t you understand how much damage you’re doing to yourself? Don’t you understand what kind of price you’re going to pay for this?! You’re destroying your entire future!”
This may all be true. However, right now it’s important for us to ascertain and understand “where the donkey is headed.” Yes, you’re standing on the sidelines, and you see his foolishness. Anyone in a good state can understand the error of the next person’s ways. The problem is that in this way, you will never be able to lift him up.
Right now, he is being dragged down into the abyss, and it won’t help to yell at him or admonish him. להצילו וארד means that we say: I need to lower myself a bit from my level, and enter his world... to try and understand how he excited he gets from his stupidities. After you have done so, you can go back up, and pull him along with you.
This is an incredibly difficult avodah, an avodah that the tzaddikim were engaged in doing. The Torah here is revealing to us that this avodah exists—and it is incumbent upon everyone to carry it out according to his ability.
Drilling Down
This avodah pertains not only to helping others, but to helping ourselves as well. A person is a fusion of a body and soul, and sometimes the communication between them breaks down. On one hand, he has feelings for Torah, tefillah, and Shabbos Kodesh, etc. But on the other hand, when a nisayon comes his way, his body takes charge and causes him to do foolish things—especially when we’re talking about habits to which the body has already become accustomed. He is held back from doing the right thing, and he doesn’t find a way out!
The only way to exit this galus is for the neshamah to pay attention to the guf and to observe its proclivities. Not to yell at the guf, but to investigate what’s going on with the guf and what it wants. The truth is that this is what the Chazal exhorted us when they said במעשיו יפשפש, one should examine his deeds. On the surface, it may seem like it means to examine his actions to see what he isn’t doing right. But a deeper understanding means to drill down into his actions to better understand them—to try and understand why am I doing this?
Questioning Ourselves
A person must turn to himself with the question: “How is it that this behavior comes to me? I don’t understand... am I so foolish?” If a person will daven hard enough during דעת לאדם חונן אתה, he will be given to understand the root of his actions. Indeed, a person needs much siyata diShmaya in order to get to the bottom of his actions; why does he react this way to things... why is he so stingy when it comes to certain people and situations... Why am I like this?
These questions are part of the להצילו וארד, lowering ourselves to help ourselves! The idea is to connect to our neshamah, which wants to elevate itself and become closer to Hashem. The neshamah isn’t angry that the guf isn’t on board and isn’t yelling at it or fighting it. The soul simply tries to understand it... what is the guf thinking? After a while of observing and investigating with earnestness, the person will begin to understand... “Perhaps this emanates from ga’avah... it’s unbefitting for me....”
A Path of Redemption
This mehalech of meditating upon and contemplating and analyzing our actions, is an incredible path of redemption—and we see that all redemptions occur in this way, for the Navi (Yeshayahu 63:9) tells us צר לו צרתם בכל, in all their troubles, He was troubled (Hashem is with us in all our suffering). Chazal also tell us: How precious are the Yidden before HaKadosh Baruch Hu, for in every place that they were exiled, the Shechinah was exiled along with them, and when they will return from the exile, the Shechinah will return along with them (Megillah 29a).
The idea isn’t merely that the Ribbono shel Olam doesn’t leave us to cope with suffering on our own—it’s much deeper than that. HaKadosh Baruch Hu says: “I have promised that I will redeem you, and if so, I must go down with you into the exile, so that I will be able to turn you around to the proper side and bring you out of there.”
When a father goes with his son to the hospital, R”l, he doesn’t simply go in order to be at his side. He goes because he will ultimately bring him home. Similarly, the Ribbono shel Olam is found with us in the Galus, not only to show us that the Shechinah feels our pain—but because at every moment in the galus, He is working to bring us back to Him!
The more a Yid follows the golden path of the Ribbono shel Olam—emulating His ways in lowering himself to redeem himself and others—he will surely merit his personal redemption, and to hasten the Final Redemption for all of Klal Yisrael.
