Judging Favorably to be Judged Favorably

Judging Favorably to be Judged Favorably

שופטים ושוטרים תתן לך בכל שעריך ... ושפטו את העם משפט צדק.

“You shall appoint judges and enforcers in all your gates...and they shall judge the nation justly.” (Devorim 16:18)

The Rachmastrivka Rebbe, in Amaros Tehoros, comments that this pasuk, which introduces Parshas Shoftim – the parsha read at the beginning of the month of Elul - alludes to the judgment that takes place each year on Rosh Hashanah. שופטים ושוטרים תתן לך – we will all stand judgment in just a few weeks, and the way we prepare for this judgment is ושפטו את העם משפט צדק – by judging other people favorably. If we give other people the benefit of the doubt, if we are forgiving, if we reserve judgment, realizing that there is so much we do not know about other people and why they act as they do, then Hashem will do the same for us.

Usually, we are our own best lawyers. We know how to give ourselves the benefit of the doubt, justifying our conduct, finding ways to excuse ourselves for our mistakes, and assuring ourselves that even if we do things wrong, we're all-in-all pretty good people. When it comes to others, however, we are generally far more exacting. We rush to criticize and condemn, and are reluctant to find mitigating factors, or to respect and admire people despite their faults and failings. ושפטו את העם משפט צדק alludes to the need to judge other people the way we want to be judged, to come to their defense the way we come to our own defense. And if we view others favorably, then we will be viewed favorably as we stand trial before Hashem on Rosh Hashanah.

The Mishnah in Pirkei Avos (2:4) famously instructs: אל תדין את חברך עד שתגיע למקומו – “Do not judge your fellow until you are in his place.” It's easy to jump to conclusions, to right away assume the worst about people. But if we are honest with ourselves, we will understand that we know so little about people and what they're going through. The Mishnah tells us not to judge people until we are in their place – which means we must never judge, because we will never be in a person's place. We will never know how a person's instincts, background, past experiences and current circumstances affect his behavior. If we meet somebody we know in a store, and he just passes us by without even saying hello, it's easy to feel angry and upset. But do we know the whole story? Perhaps he was rushing to buy Tylenol for his infant who's running a high fever, or is under some other kind of pressure. We never know. We want people to give us the benefit of the doubt when we act wrongly or appear to act wrongly – so we must do the same for them.

Moreover, just as we accept ourselves despite our deficiencies, we must accept others, as well. We know that we are far from perfect, but we nevertheless accept who we are, because we have realistic expectations of ourselves. We must look at others precisely the same way.

Everyone has their struggles and challenges. We are to judge people favorably, in a positive light, and we will then be judged the same way by Hashem. (R' Efram Goldberg shlita)