It has already been explained above regarding the thousands and tens of thousands of ups and downs that a person must go through before he’s able to serve Hashem with completion. Even the greatest tzaddikim had to overcome all of this. The main thing is to be extremely firm in one’s mind to hold on tightly to serving HaKadosh Baruch at all times, not to pay attention to any obstacles in the world, and never to abandon avodas Hashem.
Even if a person goes through all the descents in the world, nevertheless, he should strengthen himself to serve Hashem in any way he can. The essential point is not to give up, G-d forbid, but rather to start over every single time, as if he’s never begun serving Hashem at all. A person must do this continuously. Very often, he even needs to do it several times in a single day.
Sometimes, a person sees that he has been praying, begging, and pleading so much for such a long time to come closer to serving Hashem, but nevertheless it seems like Hashem is not looking at him at all and not listening to him. In fact, it appears to the person as though he is being pushed away from avodas Hashem with every kind of rejection, as if he is completely unwanted, and because of this, he gets discouraged and slacks off his Torah and mitzvos, G-d forbid. In this situation, a person should feel great shame within himself for having questioned Hashem’s ways. In truth, Hashem is certainly merciful and compassionate, and He surely desires to bring us close. Therefore, a person must go back and strengthen his mind to start over every time, as we mentioned above.
(Based on Likutei Mohoran II, 48)
