Leah conceived and bore a son. She named him Reuven...
The Ohr Hachaim discusses the order of the names of the children of Yaakov. First, we are told that Hashem saw Leah’s pain and gave her the first child in order that her husband will love her. Second, Hashem heard that she was hated and gave her a child. This is why the first child is called Reuven and the second is called Shimon.
One would expect that the first child would represent the removal of the hatred, and only the second child’s name would evoke the idea that she was loved. Why is the order turned around?
When the third child was born, the Torah tells us that Leah said עַתָּה הַפַעַם יִּלָּוֶה אִּישִּי אֵלַי - Now, this time, my husband will attach himself to me. What about the third child caused her to believe that Yaakov would attache himself to her more than the other children?
The Ohr Hachaim explains that her actions were based on her fears that Rashi told us about. Leah’s eyes were tender because she had cried so many tears about her angst about her destiny. People said that she was the older daughter and she would be a suitable wife for Esav, her older cousin. She was desperate not to end up in the house of Esav, and she constantly cried and davened that this not happen.
Even after she married Yaakov, she was unsure that her true life’s mate was Yaakov. When she had a child, she thought that Hashem was taking pity on her because she was not loved. Tzadikim always judge others favorably. She did not think she was hated, she merely thought she was not loved. Indeed, successful people generally see the best in others and their attitudes to them. They don’t see themselves as hated.
When she had her first baby, she thought that the only thing missing in her life, which was her husband’s love, would come to her.
However, when she received another child from Heaven, she realized that she must have made a mistake in the first place and she was really hated. Now that she had two children, Hashem showed her that she was missing two things, and now she had them both.
When her third child was born, she had no way of understanding the wonderful bounty that Hashem had given her. Now she realized that her marriage to Yaakov was no mistake or lucky fluke, for which the love and hatred had to be artificially added. Now, Yaakov was her true husband and there was nothing to be filled in. Now he was her true accompanier in this world.
Another explanation the Ohr Hachaim gives for this accompaniment is that even when she lives this world, Yaakov will not leave her. The Zohar tells us that couples join together in the next world forever, and now that she had three children, she was eternally associated with him.
Another explanation offered by the Ohr Hachaim is that Leah knew through Ruach Hakodesh that Yaakov would end up with four wives, and each of them would have a three child share in his family. When she had her third child, she knew that she had received her share and he would stay associated with him forever. Indeed, when she had her fourth child, she said הַפַעַם אוֹדֶה אֶת ה' – this time I will thank Hashem. Now she needed to thank Hashem for the extras that she was given from Hashem, and she praised Hashem for the great good that He had done for her.
