(on the first day of bein hazmanim before Pesach), I was working at my desk, and I had some errands to run. I knew I had to go, but I decided that I wanted to finish something first. I stuck around for a couple of minutes longer. I finished what I had to do. I then drove down Mt. Wilson Lane, making a right turn onto Reisterstown Road, as I must have done thousands of times in my life. I was turning by the green light and suddenly, the next thing I knew a car flew into me. I wound up in the corner of that little shopping strip on the corner of Mt. Wilson and Reisterstown Road. I didn’t know what happened. I asked myself “Did I go through a red light? What just happened to me?”
Within several minutes, I found out exactly what had happened: There was a fugitive of justice who was wanted for kidnapping and attempted murder in Washington D.C. He crossed state lines, making it a federal case. The United States Marshall Service was chasing after him. The marshals went up Reisterstown Road and this fugitive went down Reisterstown Road. He must have been going 70 or 80 miles per hour. The cops were in hot pursuit. This fugitive came to the red light on Mt. Wilson Lane and Reisterstown Road. After kidnapping and attempted murder, a red light was not about to stop him. He plowed into one car, plowed into a second car, and then plowed into my car before plowing into a truck which finally stopped him from going any further.
He got out of his car and started running towards the woods. The marshals ran after him and beat him to a pulp. In the meantime, my car was totaled. I am thinking in my mind that I should be suing the United States Government: Frand vs. the United States of America. I was disabused of that notion because a person cannot sue the U.S. Government when they are after somebody. At any rate, Boruch Hashem, I walked away from the incident without a scratch, despite the fact that my car was totaled. The insurance gave me a nice settlement, v’nomar Amen!
But my initial thought was that had I gotten up from my desk when I had originally intended (two or three minutes earlier), this would have never happened to me. It was only because I left my house when I did, and because I was at Reisterstown Road at that specific time, that I was involved in this multiple vehicle traffic incident.
Such a thought is kefira [heresy]. For whatever reason, the Ribbono Shel Olam wanted me to get into that accident. The reason is between me and the Ribbono Shel Olam. The way to look at what happened is not that because I waited the few extra minutes, I was involved in an accident. Rather, the proper perspective of the matter is that it was decreed in Heaven that I should be involved in that accident, and consequently, I hesitated leaving home for a few extra minutes so that I would be in that place at that time to be involved in that accident. This is the way a person must look at life.
R' Frand continues: We see this many times with elderly parents. I knew a very elderly gentleman who was living with one of his daughters in New York. He decided to come down to live with his daughter in Baltimore, and not long afterwards, he died. Everyone’s reaction is, “If he would have stayed in New York, this would not have happened. The schlepping and the effort of the relocation were too much for him. That is why he died.” No. That is not true. He died then because when he was born, it was decreed upon him exactly when he would die and where he would die.
That is the way a person needs to look at life. We should never engage in “What if?” scenarios. We believe in Hashgocha Pratis [Personal Divine Providence]. We wind up in a certain place at a certain time because the Ribbono Shel Olam wants us there at that time.
Rav Shmuel Brazil says beautifully: “Yosef ordered all the people out of the room “v’lo amad ish ito” (and no man remained with him).” Who was this “v’lo amad ish ito”? Who was this man?
Before answering this question, consider another pasuk all the way back in Parshas Vayeishev. Yaakov tells Yosef to go and check out where his brothers are. Yosef starts wandering and he can’t find his brothers. The pasuk says, “And a man found him, and behold he was blundering in the field; the man asked him ‘What do you seek?’”(Bereishis 37:15). Rashi there says this man was the Angel Gavriel. The Ribbono Shel Olam put Gavriel over there in order that he should meet Yosef and direct Yosef to Doisan, where he would meet up with his brothers.
That, says Rav Brazil, is the man the pasuk is referring to here in Parshas Vayigash where it says, “And there was no man that stood with him.” Yosef did not say “You know what? If I would not have met that man all the way back then, I would have come home to my father and said to him, ‘Guess what? I can’t find my brothers.'” Yosef did not let the thought enter his head that had he not met that man, he would not have met his brothers, and the brothers would not have sold him as a slave, and he would not have gone down to Mitzrayim, and he would not have been in the dungeon, etc., etc., etc.
The pasuk says, “the man was not standing with him” to emphasize that Yosef realized that what happened to him was not at all attributable to the chance appearance of “that man,” but rather, it was all part of a Divine plan. The Ribbono Shel Olam wanted this entire long and difficult story to occur. (R’ Frand)
