Yehuda’s Words Created Angels:
The Chidushei Harim zy”a (quoted in Likutei Yehuda) asks who these people were who were “standing around him”. He answers that Yehuda’s words created angels. A malach is called a “nitzav” (stander, see Zechariah 3:7). Thus, those “standing around” were angels. Yosef was unable to bear all of the angels that were created from Yehuda’s holy words.
Respecting Others:
The Medrash Tanchuma (65) states in the name of Rav Shimon ben Gamliel: “Yosef fell into great danger. If his brothers had killed him, no one would have known who he was. If so, why, in fact, did he tell everyone to leave him alone with them? Rav Yosef said that this is because he felt that it was preferable to allow himself to be killed than to embarrass his brothers in front of the Egyptians.”
Sefer Otzros Hatorah quotes Rav Leib Chasman zt”l (Ohr Yahal, Chelek 2) who writes that Yosef’s only desire in life was to see his father again. He hadn’t seen Yaakov in 22 years, and had longed to be returned to him every second of every day since their separation. He also knew that his father greatly longed to see him. Still and all, he was willing to give up this dream and to allow himself to be killed, rather than embarrassing someone in public.
In fact, Yosef kept this in mind for the entire 22 years that he was apart from his father. The Ohr Hachaim Hakadosh asks why Yosef stayed in Egypt for 22 years without even sending a message to his beloved father to let him know that he was alive and well. While he was a slave, it is understandable that he could not do so. But once he was freed and rose to prominence, why wouldn’t he send this message? He answers that he was worried that if Yaakov knew that he was in Egypt, he would find out that his brothers had sold him into slavery, and perhaps he would become angry and curse them. Since he didn’t want to cause them any harm, he kept the secret from his father for 22 years and did not even send him a letter.
The Pesikta (Zutrasa, Vayechi 48:1) goes so far as to say that Yaakov never found out how Yosef ended up in Egypt. He was never told that the Shevatim had sold Yosef. Furthermore, during the entire 17 years that Yaakov lived in Mitzrayim, Yosef never once came to visit him. He would not visit his father because he was worried that he might ask him how he ended up in Egypt, and he would have to tell him the truth. Since he didn’t want to embarrass his brothers, he stayed away from his father for all those years, and only saw him once right before his death.
This is an incredible lesson. We know that Yosef was extremely beloved to his father. Yaakov taught him everything he had learned in the yeshiva of Shem V’Ever. Now, he finally had the chance to learn Torah with his father again, and he knew that his father longed to spend time with him. But he gave that all up so as to ensure that he would not have to speak lashon hara about his brothers!
We find a similar concept in regards to Moshe Rabenu. Chazal say that he refused at first to accept Hashem’s mission to redeem Klal Yisroel from Mitzrayim, and it took seven years before he agreed to go. The reason for his refusal was because he was concerned that Aharon, his older brother, would feel bad that his younger brother, rather than him, had been chosen for this task.
Moshe knew that only he could redeem the nation, and if he didn’t accept this mission they would remain enslaved forever, but he would not do it if it meant shaming another Yid. He only agreed to go after Hashem promised him that his brother would be happy for him and would not be insulted.
In this vein, Rav Yechezkel Levenstein zt”l would say, “If I would know for a fact that I could rebuild the Bais Hamikdosh but this would somehow cause anguish to even one Jew, I would decide that it is preferable not to do it!”
This idea is brought out clearly from the following story that is printed in Sefer Sha’al Avicha V’Yagedcha:
Rav Yehoshua Leib Diskin zt”l would often become weak in the middle of the shiur that he regularly delivered to his students. Therefore, his devoted attendant would bring him a cup of tea in the middle of the shiur, which he would drink to revive himself. Since Rav Yehoshua Leib suffered from low blood sugar, the attendant would put several spoonsful of sugar into the tea.
One day, some students noticed that the Rebbitzen seemed very upset. When they asked what was wrong, she said that she had just discovered that there was a container of salt sitting next to the hot water urn, in the place where the sugar was supposed to be. She realized that the attendant must have put salt into her husband’s tea instead of sugar. This was very dangerous for Rav Yehoshua Leib, as so much salt was bad for his health.
The students said that they hadn’t noticed anything wrong when Rav Yehoshua Leib drank his tea. Since he drank it like usual, they assumed that it must have had sugar in it. However, after looking into it, they found out that the tea had, in fact, been full of salt, just as the Rebbitzen suspected. The students were amazed that Rav Yehoshua Leib had drank the tea without showing any distaste.
They approached him and asked, “How were you allowed to do this? It is very dangerous for you to ingest so much salt!” He replied, “The Gemara explicitly says that it is better to allow oneself to be thrown into a fiery furnace than to embarrass someone in public. Therefore, it would have been forbidden for me to embarrass the attendant for his mistake.”
