The Pele Yoetz writes, “Each mitzvah has its mazal. People are prepared to spend a lot of money to have the merit to open the aron kodesh or to be a sandak, although these aren’t actual mitzvos – not from the Torah and not from the Rabbanan. They are chibuv mitzvah, which shows our love for the mitzvos. Ashreihem Yisrael [they are fortunate]! However, each time one obeys his father or mother, he does a mitzvah from the Torah. Only fools transgress this commandment, and they are punished.”
The Torah (18:3) tells the names of Moshe Rabbeinu's children: האחד ושם ...גרשם האחד שם אליעזר, "The name of one was Gershom... and the name of one was Eliezer..." It seems that it would have read easier if it had stated, "and the name of the other one was Eliezer," or "and the name of the second one was Eliezer." This is how it is written by the korban tamid: הכבש את האחד תעשה בבוקר ואת הכבש השני תעשה בין הערבים, "One sheep should be made in the morning and the second sheep should be made in the afternoon." Why does the Torah write about Gershom and Eliezer האחד שם ... האחד שם, "the name of one... the name of one..."
This is teaching us a lesson in chinuch. You should consider each child as though he is your only child. None of your children should be a "second child" or just "another child." Each child is like your one and only child.
If you are devoted like that to your children, one of the benefits is that it will make it easier for them to keep the mitzvah of honoring their parents. As is known, a good relationship between parents and children makes it easier for the child to honor his parents.
Hakaras HaTov
The Sefer HaChinuch (33) writes, "The reason for the mitzvah of honoring parents is that it is proper for one to be makir tovah (recognize) and to reciprocate with kindness to those who do kindness to him. He shouldn’t act like he didn’t receive anything from his fellow man. That is a bad attitude, which is disgusting before Hashem and man. His father and mother brought him into the world. From when he was a child, they toiled to raise him. He should always remember this and truly honor them in every way possible."
Hakaras hatov is the foundation of avodas Hashem. The Aseres HaDibros begins with אנכי ה' אלקיך אשר הוצאתיך מארץ מצרים מבית עבדים, "I am Hashem, your G-d who took you out of Mitzrayim, from the house of slavery." The pasuk is commanding us to accept Hashem's reign because of the good He bestowed on us; He freed us from Mitzrayim.
When the Yidden stood on the Yam Suf's shore, helpless and scared Hashem saved them by splitting the sea.
The Yidden had weapons, as it states (13:18), וחמושים עלו בני ישראל מארץ מצרים, "Bnei Yisrael came out of Mitzrayim armed with weapons." We also know they had weapons because they used them in their war against Amalek. So why did the sea need to split? They could have raised their weapons and waged war against the Mitzrim.
The Chasam Sofer answers that since the Mitzrim hosted Klal Yisrael, it wouldn’t be right to raise weapons against them.
From here, we can learn the importance and necessity of showing Hakaras Hatov. The Mitzrim enslaved Bnei Yisroel, and they embittered their lives with hard work. Did they deserve hakaras hatov? Apparently, they did.
It states, וישמע יתרו, and Rashi explains, מה שמועה שמע ובא קריעת ים סוף ומלחמת עמלק, “What did Yisro hear and therefore come? He heard about kriyas Yam Suf and the war against Amalek.”
The Ksav Sofer explains that from the war with Amalek, Yisro surmised that the Yidden had weapons. Yisro wondered, "If they had weapons, why did the Yidden need the miracle of kriyas Yam Suf? They could have waged war against the Egyptians!"
Yisro understood that not using those weapons was because the Yidden had hakaras hatov for the Mitzrim who accepted them into their land.
Initially, Yisro was hesitant to join klal Yisroel, because he thought that perhaps the nation wouldn’t accept him. But when he discovered that Yidden possessed the middah of hakaras hatov, he knew they would surely welcome him. After all, he had saved their leader, Moshe, when he escaped Mitzrayim.
Therefore, when Yisro heard קריעת ים סוף ומלחמת עמלק, he came to the desert to be with the Jewish nation.
