A chassan once came to the Slonimer Rebbe ztl and told him how he was preparing for his wedding. He gave the Rebbe a paper showing how he planned to learn longer and better to grow spiritually as a preparation for his wedding. The Rebbe looked at the paper and said, "This is very good, but you missed the main thing." The Rebbe wrote on the paper, "MIDDOS IS ABOVE ALL!"
What's The Lesson?
Growing spiritually also means becoming nicer and kinder to others.
This connects to the Three Weeks:
As we go from Shiva Asar BeTammuz into the Three Weeks, we should be much more thoughtful about our middos and how we treat others. The Beis Hamikdash was destroyed because of sinas chinom, hating others for no reason. If we work on ourselves to be more focused on helping others, it will be much harder to hate others.
