A belief in something greater than myself started at a young age. When I was a little girl, I remember looking out my window towards a beautiful Kansas summer sunset. My dad came over and he pointed to the orange light rays peeking through a purplish, bluish cloud. He said, "Look Samantha, that's G-d's work!" I will always remember that special moment, because it was a time of true, unfiltered belief. It continued to stick with me throughout my life.
My parents instilled strong Jewish values within me. Growing up we always had Passover Seders (led by my grandfather Pops), lit the Chanukah candles, and attended Hebrew School (whether we wanted to or not). We hosted Rosh Hashanah meals at my house and my brothers and I would always steal the honey sticks.
In high school, my interest in Judaism continued when I decided to join BBYO. I dabbled a bit in NCSY when I took my first trip to Israel at age 16. On that month-long trip to Israel I had my first taste of Shabbat. I found it to be beautiful at the time, but never actually considered taking it on.
My true Jewish growth really started to develop in college, at the University of Kansas. As a freshman, majoring in design, I joined a sorority. I was living it up. But I knew that I needed something more meaningful in my life, because every morning after a night of partying I always felt empty. I felt that same emptiness when I decided to solely focus on my design projects in school and forgo the parties.
In my junior year I decided to quit the sorority. My new apartment-mate, Emily, convinced me to go to Chabad on Friday (mostly because I had a car). At first I begrudgingly agreed. But when she left for her semester in Spain, I continued to go to Chabad. Every single week.
Rabbi Zalman and Nechama Tiechtel created such an amazing atmosphere in the Chabad House. My closest, most genuine friends today are all from Chabad at KU. We became family. With Rabbi and Nechama there was so much laughter and simcha (joy). And they made me feel so special for every mitzvah that I did.
After college, my parents helped schlepp me to Chicago. It was my next stop in life. I was looking for a larger Jewish community. Moving to a brand-new city was a very lonely experience at first. Little by little I started to get the hang of city life. And then, eight months into my first graphic design job, my boss let me go. I was devastated. Shattered. For the next five months, job searching became my new career. Knowing I had extra time, I decided to spend Shabbat with the Staal family in West Rogers Park. After spending four Shabbats in a row, I knew I needed to add Shabbat to my Jewish repertoire. I also incorporated eating only kosher into my life and dressing modestly. By taking on all of these things in a calculated, gradual manner, something inside me felt completely fulfilled.
Things were looking up. I reached out to my old co-worker, and her partner happened to work at Leo Burnett, an internationally renowned advertising company. He agreed to look through my portfolio and help me develop my website.
Before I knew it, I started my new job at Arc Worldwide, a division of Leo Burnett. During this time, I continued my Jewish growth. I mustered up the courage to tell my boss that I needed to leave early in the winter for Shabbat. Rabbi Dovid and Devorah Leah Kotlarsky in Lakeview, Chicago, helped me make my kitchen kosher.
I had some extra vacation days that I wanted to use to study somewhere. By divine providence, a few of my college friends had been visiting Chicago and so we decided to visit Chaya Schurder, who works for Chabad on Campus. When I told her my desire to go learn, she said, "For such a short time, just go to Machon L'Yahadus!"
This past October I journeyed to Machon L'Yahadus for ten days. It was incredible. I felt like a little sponge! My soul absolutely needed the learning, without a doubt. The last day of the trip, I visited the Rebbe's Ohel. It was such a surprisingly calm experience for me, both peaceful and purposeful. I asked for basic clarity within my life, and that in the right time I could come back and learn again. It was so sad to leave and I was missing it the second I left. When would I ever have this opportunity again? We'll see, I thought. But I have to work. When I returned, my creative director and senior art director pulled me into a quick catch-up meeting.
My creative director said, "Well, this is going to be some hard news to digest. And we didn't want to bother you on your vacation. But our team is moving to Cincinnati where Proctor and Gamble's headquarters are." My heart stopped. What? But how is this possible, I thought? She said, "This is really hard for all of us. But it's a time to pause and ask yourself, 'what do YOU really want to do?'" I knew what I really wanted to do. I had just been at the Rebbe's Ohel. I had just come back from a magical Machon L'Yahadus experience. This was a miracle.
The head creative of the agency encouraged me, saying my yeshiva experience would make me a more interesting and diverse person. My parents were supportive in my decision once I had the fine details figured out, and I showed them that this was something I truly wanted. I sold all the furniture from my Chicago apartment. Four months later, I made the move. When I walked in the door, I was greeted with open arms. Literally.
Returning to Machon L'Yahadus has been one of the best decisions of my life. From the staff, headed by Rabbi Shloma Majeski, the classes, the individualised study, our Shabbatons, trips into the city, late night farbrengens, and dance parties in the dorm - it's been an experience that cannot be matched. I've really been living what I learn.
I have no regrets about my decision to venture to Machon. Machon L'Yahadus has truly brought back my child-like, pure faith in G-d from that moment with my Dad, looking outside the window into the sunset in an even stronger way than ever before.
For more information about Machon L'Yahadus Women's Yeshiva, visit womensyeshiva.org or call 718-552-2422. A similar seminary, Merkos Women, is also available locally in Melbourne. For more information please visit: merkos.com.au or call 03 9527 7010.
