The word came to Yaakov that his brother Aysav was coming to greet him, accompanied by 400 men armed to the teeth. It was obvious to all that Aysav intended to kill Yaakov. The posuk tells us that Yaakov feared greatly.
In Brachos 4a, Rebbe Yaakov Bar Idi states there is a contradiction between this posuk and an earlier one. When Yaakov was leaving his father’s house, HASHEM promised him that he would be protected. If so, how is it possible that Yaakov was now afraid?
Rebbe Yaakov bar Idi answers that Yaakov was afraid that HASHEM’s promise to guard him might have been based on the assumption that Yaakov would remain on the level he was on. Yaakov feared that he might have sinned and was no longer the same man he once was, so the promise no longer applied. Therefore, there is no contradiction. HASHEM’s promise to guard him was based on his remaining on the madreigah that was then, and he was afraid that he had lost that level of purity. Therefore, he was now afraid of Aysav.
This Gemara becomes difficult to understand when we take into account that after all is said and done, Yaakov Avinu was still a human. No matter how great the Avos were, they were made out of the same flesh and blood that we are, had the same physical makeup that we do, and faced all the challenges of being a human being.
This means that Yaakov had that most difficult challenge of life: integrating his intellectual understandings into practice, of believing and not believing. Of course he knew that HASHEM promised to protect him, but here he was faced with a brother whose nature he knew quite well: a powerful, driven man who had a burning desire to settle an old grudge. This man didn’t come alone; he brought with him an army to aid in what was his clear intention — murder. So why does Rebbe Yaakov bar Idi assume that it was impossible for Yaakov to be afraid? Maybe Yaakov was just scared — not because of any sin that changed his level, but because of the danger that he faced. Perhaps he was afraid of Aysav, afraid of being out there alone, and afraid of dying.
