For Those Who Like to Destroy Themselves, I Have Some Great Chazal’s to Help You Out
- כָל הַ פוֹסֵ ק מִ דִּ בְ רֵ י תוֹרָ ה, וְעוֹסֵ ק בְ דִ בְ רֵ י שִ יחָ ה - מַ אֲ כִ ילִ ין אוֹתוֹ גַחֲ לֵ י רְ תָ מִ ים חגיגה יב ב You will eat hot coals for your wicked Bittul Torah.
- הִ רְ הוּרֵּ י עֲ בֵּ ירָ ה קָ שִ ין מֵּ עֲבֵּ ירָ ה יומא כט א Ta'ava thoughts are worse than real Arayos.
- Chazal say horrific things about learning: ל ֹ שֶׁ א לִ המָ שְׁ (for selfish reasons), or doing things with your own self-interest.
You are, as usual, selfish, and you only care about yourself. You don’t really have Ahavas Yisroel (you only like people of your type). You don’t really have a Geshmak in Torah and Ruchaniyus.
You are lazy, and you only do what you like. You care only for your own Kavod, and not Kavod Shamayim. You’re too soft and/or hard, and your Middos aren’t balanced. You are not doing your potential. All you care about is people’s opinions of you.
You don’t really care for others. You aren’t Oisgehalten. You have no control with Ka'as and/or Ta'ava. If people would only know what you do in private. You don’t really have respect and Kavod Talmidei Chachomim. You are full of cynicism and sarcasm. You are way too impatient. וּמְ שַׁ לֵּ ם לְ שׂנְ אָ יו אֶּ ל פָ נָיו לְ הַׁ אֲ בִ ידוֹ (Hashem rewards the Reshaim for their few Mitzvos in this world, so that they should lose their Olam HaBah) is for you.
The reason why you lost so much money and/or Nachas, and why you got sick, Rachmana Litzlan, is because of your many sins. You don’t learn Mussar. You are disliked. All those “praises” people tell you, is just Chanufa (empty flattery). You don’t have that many friends. You’re a Baal Ga'ava who thinks he’s better than everyone.
Who should love a depressed person like you? You are a Shafel, who thinks he’s worthless and will never get anywhere. Your eating habits are for Eisav HaRasha. You talk too much/too little. People cannot depend on you. You can’t keep a Kabala (resolution). No hope. The list can go on forever!
In Novardok they said that these type of thoughts (unless there is a To'eles) can be worse than: רְ הִ הוּרִ ים רָ עִ ים improper thoughts. They are complete Yetzer Hara, despite so many true Chazal’s. You need to spend loads of time finding the Chazal’s and thoughts that make you look like a Tzaddik.
The Yetzer Hara is very good at “proving” how wrong and evil and incompetent you are! If you “go-to-war” against a Treife mentality like the above, you can Shteig without end. We don’t Chap how people actually have a Geshmak in feeling sorry and angry at themselves, or feeling guilty and incompetent, which are all forms of the Frummer Yetzer Hara.
It is the biggest Mitzva to spend time and energy finding the many Maalos and quotes from Chazal that prove your situation to be the best in the world
