How much pain and heartache people have because they wish things would be different! How many people call me complaining: “I worked so hard on Bitachon or Hoda'ah, and then, not only don’t things improve, they get worse, Chas V'shalom!” Of course, very, very often they do improve, and often it works like a fiddle. Even one Kapit'el Tehilim can bring major Yeshuos!
But you need to realize that you are not the boss of your life. עַל כָרְ חֲךָ אַתָה נוצָר אבות ד כב You were created against your will; you have a right and a Chiyuv to help things improve, but for your own Menuchas HaNefesh, you’d be much happier when you throw your hands up and say: “Borei Olam (Creator of the entire universe), You’re in charge, and not me!”
It’s very taxing and strenuous when you feel you’re totally in charge, and it’s a form of Kapara, Chas V'shalom. Relax, and let Hashem run His world the way He wishes, and someday you’ll find out how good all that evil and pain in your life really was. The Avos didn’t seem to get everything they wished. They had plenty unpleasant surprises and acute pain all over, and yet, they are the everlasting heroes of mankind. And don’t accuse yourself; notice how much Yissurim and disappointment the Avos had. מַ עֲ שֵּ ה אָ בות סִ ימָ ן לַ בָ נִ ים The experiences of the Avos are a prophecy for their descendants. This gives you tremendous Menucha, when you don’t have such an: עול (burden) of being in charge. Just try your best, and you’re fine. You don’t live forever, anyway.
What a Mussar Haskel! When the Shevotim heard: אֲנִי יוסֵּף “I am Yosef” and realized the truth. People have so much unnecessary “fake pain”! חֲזַק חֲזַק וְנִתְחַזַק Be M'chazek yourself!
This is a major form of Bitachon, when you let Hashem run His world the way He wishes, and don’t give Him your “brilliant advice”. When you realize that He’s in charge and not you, it gives plenty of Simcha. “Accepting” is a big Tikun for your Neshama, and it brings Yeshuos. You’ll live longer and healthier, and you won’t be such a nervous “basket case” also.
